Reporter's Note: President Obama, I’m pretty sure, does not have to help decorate the White House for Christmas. Yet another advantage he has over most of the rest of us.
Tom Foreman | BIO
Dear Mr. President,
Well, I told you last week that I was going to get all the Christmas lights up at our house over this weekend, and I must sadly report that it has been a mess. Last year I cut through giant, Gordian knots of wires, haunted by the ghosts of many Christmases past, to separate all of the working strands from those countless others that suffered from a variety of maladies. Some lit up along the wire near the plug, some in the middle, some at the far end. Some inexplicably came on, then went off, then four minutes later blinked furiously. Some simply sat there, dark and mysterious, like a girlfriend I once had when she descended into a foul mood. And a few did what they were supposed to do: They glowed cheerily as soon as I plugged them in, and they stayed that way.
So I gently put aside these “nice” strands; gathered up all of the naughty ones, and threw them into the trash. Finally, I thought, my Christmas lighting display woes will be at an end. I put up the winners; the house looked magnificent; and I carefully took them all down after Christmas and packed them away. So you can imagine my consternation when I pulled them out this weekend to find, once again, about half of them are not working! Arghhh!
I toyed with the idea of individually cutting them down to “the good parts” and then splicing all of those together to create, once again, complete strands of Christmas joy. But that proved impractical. So now, I am considering one of three drastic moves.
1) I go to the store and purchase replacements for the whole lot; a vast collection of those new LED Christmas lights that seem to burn so brilliantly and use less energy to boot.
2) I convert to another faith that doesn’t require so much cheeriness.
Or 3) I don’t put up any Christmas lights this year.
Suffice to say, I need to close this out and get going. The store is not open all night. Oh well … both the economy and the environment can use the help.
Call if you can. I’ll have my cell phone, and no matter the hour, chances are good I’ll be in the yard and eager for a break.
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