October 2nd, 2009
03:49 PM ET

My late show confession

Michael Schulder
CNN Senior Executive Producer

I admit it. I couldn’t resist the headline. My confession doesn’t rival David Letterman’s. But I have to get it off my chest. When I was reading CNN.com’s home page yesterday, as we were approaching CNN TV’s prime time programming hour, before we got wind of the Letterman story, the first link I clicked on was entitled: “Why Women Have Sex.” As soon as I clicked it, I realized, I was in danger of being exposed.

When you click on a link on a web site the headline usually turns a different shade, and stays that shade. When you share a computer, as we do in the CNN newsroom, the next person who logs on can often see what stories the previous user has read. So there I was. Exposed for the next person who would take my seat in the CNN newsroom. How embarrassing it would have been to have others learn that the one and only story I read on cnn.com was “Why Women Have Sex.” I quickly tried to cover my tracks.

I started clicking on virtually every other story on the home page so that “Why Women Have Sex” was not the only headline in a different shade. To solidify my alibi, I actually read those other stories, so, just in case, I’d be able to prove that I’m not just a clicker, I’m a reader.

I read “What To Know About Getting H1N1 Vaccine.” CNN’s senior medical correspondent Elizabeth Cohen informed us that the vaccine begins arriving next week and will come in a shot or nasal spray. Importantly, she alerted us that some of the vaccines will contain the mercury based preservative thimerasol, which many parents do not want in their children’s bodies. Other versions of the vaccine won’t contain thimerasol, according to CNN’s Cohen. So, if that’s important to you, now you know you can ask your doctor.

I clicked on a story from Detroit entitled: “Too Broke to Bury Their Dead.” I learned that an unusually high 67 bodies are piled up in the Wayne County morgue – apparently because the relatives don’t have the money to claim them. A sign of the economic times at the bottom economic rung of our society.

I clicked on “Oldest Human Skeleton Offers New Clues to Evolution,”  where I learned that 125 bone fragments discovered in Ethiopia many years ago have been identified as a 4.4 million old female who stood erect. The oldest hominid by far, a million years older than the famous Lucy skeleton, which suggests human evolution took much longer than previously believed. And it all started when one observant grad student found a single upper molar which led to a successful three year dig.

I then turned up the volume on my desktop TV when I noticed Wolf Blitzer was interviewing California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger about criticism from his fellow Republican primary challenger. She claims Schwarzenegger, who’s been aggressive about reducing California’s global warming carbon emissions, is putting the environment ahead of the economy. Schwarzenegger answered that a healthy environment and a healthy economy go hand in hand. Important material.

The list goes on. I don’t mean to sound like a CNN ad. But I could have flipped back and forth between cnn.com and CNN TV all day long. I learned so much. So now I’m ready to return to My Late Show Confession and the story I felt compelled but embarrassed to read in the first place: Why Women Have Sex. I’m too modest to relay the details to you. You’ll have to read them yourself.

But now that I’ve spent all that time covering my tracks on cnn.com, reading all those stories, learning so much, I know what I want the answer to be. Women have sex when they are with a guy who’s well informed.

soundoff (2 Responses)
  1. Theresa, Des Moines

    Cute. Many of us have covered "embarassing" material on work computers.

    October 2, 2009 at 6:31 pm |
  2. William of Iowa

    I don't know. When a friend of a friend told me what was in the story "Why Women Have Sex" I do not recall being chatty as one of the reasons.

    October 2, 2009 at 4:17 pm |