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March 30th, 2009
01:53 PM ET

Love Shack, baby

[cnn-photo-caption image=http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/2009/images/03/30/art.spelling.manor.jpg caption="Candy Spelling's 56,500-square-foot French château-style mansion in Holmby Hills, Los Angeles, is on the market."]

Jack Gray
AC360° Producer/Writer

Well, it took me the weekend to be sure, but I’ve finally found the perfect home:  Candy Spelling’s $150 million Los Angeles mansion.  I know it sounds a bit extravagant but I truly believe this is written in the stars:  I’ve never told anyone this before, but my middle name is Candy.  Of course, I spell it Candi, but whatever.

I know what you’re thinking:  “He just wants it because the price is so low.”  And while, yes, it’s true, I do love a bargain, I also have a strong personal connection to the house.  And I’m not just talking about the time Joan Collins made me a man in the foyer.

I remember years ago – before I left Hollywood for the lucrative world of part-time video store/tanning parlor cashiering – sitting by the pool, drinking a Rolls Royce hood ornament smoothie while Candy’s late husband, iconic television producer Aaron Spelling, tried to convince me to do a three-episode guest stint on Beverly Hills 90210.  Apparently he had liked my work on T.J. Hooker as William Shatner’s illegitimate son, Chip.

But as much as I wanted to do the 90210 role, I had to turn it down for fear of being typecast as a less-brooding-but-hotter-and-with-better-hair version of Luke Perry.  Plus, Aaron balked at giving me a separate trailer for my yoga mats and condiments.

Still, nothing is perfect and Spelling Manor is no exception.  For example, it has only three gift-wrapping rooms.  Which makes me nervous what with Arbor Day coming up.  Apparently the house used to have four gift-wrapping rooms but one was turned into a spot where Tori Spelling could display her Oscars.  And when it became clear that wouldn’t be necessary they made it into a room where Shannen Doherty could go to relax and kick puppies.

On the plus side, it’s a great house in which to entertain.  Finally, I’ll be able to compete with Larry King on the party circuit.  I’m so tired of him preventing me from having the kind of beautiful friendship with Kim Kardashian that I know I was born to have.

But back to the price.  Because I know that’s what you’re fixated on.  You and your gotcha politics.  Yes, $150 million could be considered a bit steep but, come on people, it’s not like there’s a recession.  So just lower your eyebrows and no one will get hurt.

And by the way, it’s not like I haven’t worked hard to get this house.  I know you think my job is all glamorous, hobnobbing with Nancy Grace at the frozen yogurt machine and trying on Ali Velshi’s double-breasted suits when he’s not looking.  But it has its darker moments, too.  You think I wanted to donate a kidney to Harvey, the pot-bellied pig Anderson keeps in his dressing room?  Well, think again.

So, if you’ll excuse me.  I need to go make an offer on the Spelling mansion.  56,000 square feet of understated Hollywood charm.

But if the doorbell doesn’t play the theme from Melrose Place then the whole deal is off.

_________

Follow Jack Gray on Twitter


Filed under: 360° Radar • Jack Gray
soundoff (50 Responses)
  1. Don, WA

    Are any of Charlie's Angels looking for a new shoulder to float over? I mean, my angel is pretty cool, got me out of some sticks....but.....
    Oh, nevermind...I like the angel on my shoulder. I'd bet that after subtracting the square footage of the panic room of the Spelling mansion, there's only about 3,000 square feet of actual living space anyway. Better to have angels on your shoulder that will have you pause at the way wind strums the strings of trees.

    March 31, 2009 at 1:32 am |
  2. Jolene, St. Joseph, MI

    And I’m not just talking about the time Joan Collins made me a man in the foyer.

    Oh Jack, please don't tell me you did a "Spitzer" and only wore socks... 😉

    Nevertheless, you simply amaze me! You go from purchasing an iPhone to a $150 million manor within a week! What really sealed the deal for you? That personal connection with Joan or the mere fact that every room in the house has a "snuggie" in it? Hmmm.

    Fantastic blog today!

    March 30, 2009 at 11:02 pm |
  3. Sandi from CA

    Maybe I will think about buying this 150M home because I hate paying rent. People always say buying a house is better than paying rent, right?

    March 30, 2009 at 8:55 pm |
  4. Kathy, Chicago

    Love Shack-my family banned me from karaoke singing that song! We can all chip in and live with you-one big happy blogging family! We could all drive AC crazy. Have a great Monday and happy wrapping in your new wrap room!

    March 30, 2009 at 8:53 pm |
  5. Isabel (Brazil)

    Hi, Jack!

    I just managed to stop now to read your post!
    The day was "punk"!

    Very funny post!

    Jack,
    The house is beautiful, but it seems excessive. I particularly prefer a penthouse, but it is matter of taste, I prefer building. Lol ...

    I give the greatest support to you.
    Look at the coincidence ... Tomorrow is my scheduled interview for the visa to the US ... Ok that my beloved boss was for 7:30am, but that is a detail.

    Prepare the champagne that I am coming ... in May ... lol ...

    Kiss

    March 30, 2009 at 7:47 pm |
  6. Jean hildebrandt

    Can I please live in the west wing, I promise, you will never know I am there. lol, First blog that I have read of yours, new to twitter. Thanks for the laugh. Have a great evening.

    March 30, 2009 at 7:32 pm |
  7. Tammy, Berwick, LA

    Dang. Imagine trying to find your way around that place after a night of beer pong and whiskey chasers. Does it come with its own GPS? It should be mandatory for ownership.

    Just remember, never buy real estate "as is". I'd love to watch the inspection on this house and see the realtor's face as shoddy work is exposed and Mrs. Spelling has to cough up money for extra repair costs before the closing.

    March 30, 2009 at 7:23 pm |
  8. Paula V., Boston, MA

    You should take Harvey home with you. I'm sure Sammy wouldn't mind sharing a room.

    Seriously, who has $150 million to spare? Tiger Woods? Maybe they should turn that mansion into a hotel. California needs more ways to stimulate their local economy.

    March 30, 2009 at 6:19 pm |
  9. Jack Gray

    @Brandi: thank you for catching that typo. Nobody - especially me - is perfect.

    March 30, 2009 at 6:14 pm |
  10. Brandi - bottom of the boot

    @chris

    i knew you would find the mental images hilarious! lol

    hmmm...there is something different abut the blog from this morning...i cant imagine what it is? lol im unemployed jack, need a proofer?

    March 30, 2009 at 6:08 pm |
  11. Ratna, New York, NY

    Dear Jack Gray,

    I thought that you were not a real existing person, but a composition of anonymous writers. But Sammy is very cute!

    March 30, 2009 at 5:59 pm |
  12. Carol B.

    Another funny post 'Candi man. If you'd really like to sound humble, maybe you can refer to your crib as a "cottage" like the sprawling manses in Newport, RI.!

    March 30, 2009 at 5:49 pm |
  13. Don, WA

    I'm thinking that the big circular fountain area behind the mansion is really the retracting lid of a covert underground launching silo for a "Bob's Big Boy" cryogenically sealed space vehicle. She could've probably gotten, or at least asked for, One...Biiiiiiillion Dollars!!

    March 30, 2009 at 5:25 pm |
  14. Vanessa, El Paso, TX

    Hiya Jack...very funny post! I guess I have somebody to compete cuz I too put in a offer..so your Candi, huh? when I found out it only had '3' gift wrapping rooms instead of '4' I just about hit the roof! I mean, do they not realize Earth Day and Cinco de Mayo are coming up?
    So I guess the battle begins, "Candi vs. Spnshgrl416", and Jack, Beware!
    lol
    Oh, BTW, Harvey just called, you need to "clean up" the present he left! 😉

    Very good laugh, Jack, catch on twitter, Luv ya Lots! 🙂

    March 30, 2009 at 4:53 pm |
  15. Joanne Pacicca, Solvay, NY

    hmmm, the classy version of Neverland.

    March 30, 2009 at 4:49 pm |
  16. Pamina

    Hi Jack,
    Well, I guess I'll have to thumb wrestle you for the Ex-Spelling mansion! I could just imagine you, a-la- Tom Cruise sliding across the foyer in your underwear- by the time you reach the end, the song will be over!!!
    Have a great night.

    March 30, 2009 at 4:34 pm |
  17. Tammy

    Hey Jack:

    Wonderful blog. Hilarious! Love It!.

    March 30, 2009 at 3:27 pm |
  18. Pati Mc Camp Hill, PA

    Aaahhhhh Jack...

    Just had a stellar idea....you can rent out some of the rooms to OctuMom and the young-un's and write it off as a tax deduction.!!! Heck with that joint, they can have their won "wing". Next thing you know, you will own your own country! LOL. Jacki Candi-Land !!!! It will make the Neverland Ranch look like a dump, no doubt.

    @Chris Sosa & Brandi – are you two thinking what I am thinking??? I betcha you are! 🙂

    March 30, 2009 at 3:15 pm |
  19. Annie Kate

    Jack

    Wonderful post. I think though you should seriously buy that house. Before you go in for the first time though tie a very long rope to an outside tree and then to your waist – that way if you get lost in that mansion you can follow the rope back to your starting place.

    Wonder how many powder rooms it has? And you need to be sure that the lights in them are the kind that flatter your complexion.

    So you'll be living the life of Riley in that house – where is Sammie's house? She demands a proportional time and square footage. After all she has 4 feet to your two so she figures twice your square footage will set her up just fine. She can have all her friends over and indulge in her favorite activities without someone grousing at her to clean up her act. Sammie also might let Anderson's pot bellied pig stay with her if the pig will leave the mud in Anderson's office.

    Be sure and get a warranty on the house. I'd hate for you to wind up like that movie "The Money Pit" where Tom Hanks bought a beautiful old house and it fell apart and he fell through a hole in the floor. I can just see you dangling from the second level in a oriental rug.

    Go get that house – and then plan a big housewarming party – show those people in Hollywood what a real party looks like!

    March 30, 2009 at 3:11 pm |
  20. Nicole, San Diego

    Oh Jack….I’m crying. Thanks for the laugh. With all the money you’ll save you can convert the Oscar/puppy room back to into a 4th gift wrapping room (problem solved).

    March 30, 2009 at 2:54 pm |
  21. Sharon S

    Amusing as always Jack!!! Glad you started my Monday off with a good laugh!

    March 30, 2009 at 2:39 pm |
  22. laura

    Hey Jack, I hope you get the mansion. I am one of the many unemployed. I would be happy to be the official gift wrapper.

    March 30, 2009 at 2:35 pm |
  23. Jennifer - Michigan

    Hi Jack Candi,
    Very funny blog today! But yeah, way too much upkeep for that big ole mansion, ugh!. I couldn't even imagine the work needed for that!! I'm already having trouble with my own 2000 sq foot house, too big. Of course, I'm not the best house-keeper in the world, oh well. My poor husband tolerates it, so I guess it's ok. He hasn't threatened to trade me in yet. That, or I'll have to get a maid (yeah right).
    Anyway, hope you have a great day today. Thanks for the laughs. Talk to you later.

    March 30, 2009 at 1:51 pm |
  24. L. Carilo, H.R. CO

    Hey Jack,

    So, is it Jack Fructose Candy Gray or Jack Candy Fructose Gray? I'm thinking J.F.C.G. has the better ring to it. How about you? ~ L.C.

    March 30, 2009 at 1:47 pm |
  25. Michael "C" Lorton, Virginia

    Do you own anything bigger? A little small for me–

    March 30, 2009 at 1:26 pm |
  26. xtina, chicago IL

    really funny ! exceptionally funny post – I read it twice it was so funny 🙂

    Thanks !

    March 30, 2009 at 1:26 pm |
  27. Chris Sosa - Boston, MA

    Oh, Jack. Joan Collins, huh? I'm just not even going to ask. But moving on: At such a steal, how could you not purchase the mansion? Definitely check the doorbell though. They get you on the details.

    I remember once trying to bargain my way into getting a discount on Lance Bass's old place. We discussed his favorite *NSync song ("It Makes Me Ill"), took pictures together, everything. But alas, it was to no avail, some rich guy apparently picked up the house at ticket price.

    @Brandi – Mmm-hmm. Lots of really hilarious images running through my mind right now.

    March 30, 2009 at 1:22 pm |
  28. Rose

    Jacki Candi,

    You deserve that mansion-I'll give you $50 towards the down payment. Don't worry, someday you'll have your own mansion with a doorbell playing your favorite tv themes.

    Keep working hard....you'll get there!

    March 30, 2009 at 1:11 pm |
  29. Mark

    Imagine how many swiffers you'd go thru in a day, OY!

    March 30, 2009 at 1:08 pm |
  30. Helen, Reading, UK

    Hey Jacqueline! So, you spell Candi with an i, huh? When you write it, I bet you put a little heart over the i, instead of the dot, don't you? Candy Crowley must be so mad she didn't think of that first! You couldn't possibly have been in T J Hooker, I was a teenager when that aired, which means you weren't even a twinkle in Ma and Pa Gray's eyes. And you would also have been far too young for 90210, heck, all those 'teenagers' were almost drawing their pensions! I'm wondering why you need a $150 million mansion anyway? Is it so all us groupies can come stay? Or is it so Sammy can turn it into some kind of doggy Playboy mansion? Anderson must be realising that he pays you far too much if you can afford a place like that. You may find yourself following that pot bellied pig around with a shovel soon if you're not careful.. Have a good Monday, hi to all the fellow Facebookers and Twitterers out there!

    March 30, 2009 at 1:04 pm |
  31. Lilibeth

    I remember T.J. Hooker. I actually enjoyed the series. I had a crush on William Shatner’s sidekick (I forgot his name). But if I had $150 million, I wouldn’t spend it on a mansion (several homes, maybe). Oh you’re comical!

    Lilibeth
    Edmonds, Washington

    March 30, 2009 at 1:03 pm |
  32. Tracey

    Talented, good looking, AND funny!! Thanks for the laugh!

    March 30, 2009 at 1:00 pm |
  33. st2dione

    funny

    March 30, 2009 at 12:58 pm |
  34. Kimberley

    Be careful – with big house comes big responsibility! Who knows how many electronic gadgets you'll have to master?

    Loved your blog... as usual. Thanks for the laughs (out louds)!

    March 30, 2009 at 12:56 pm |
  35. Kristine

    haha wow thats great!

    March 30, 2009 at 12:54 pm |
  36. Giselle

    I think it’s the perfect time to buy.

    Knock 50% off the price due to the recession.

    Missing one gift wrapping room – take off another 15 Million.

    She needs to sell – the ball is in your court – take off another 10 Million

    When you think about it, the house is practically a steal for $50,000,000.

    Go for it.

    March 30, 2009 at 12:52 pm |
  37. Shannon

    Hahaha. Another great article Jack!! Good luck to them in trying to sell that now! Ouch. I would most definitely get lost in 55,000 sq. feet of house. If it had a place where I could go scuba diving right on the property they may have had an offer from me....

    March 30, 2009 at 12:35 pm |
  38. Renee

    @ Jack: You know you would be a great neighbor to Heff. You know walking Sammy by to say hello to all the girls!

    I have to confess you are the ONLY one I read beside Gergen on the blog. Are you working at Caroline's on the weekends?
    Thanks for keeping me laughing.

    March 30, 2009 at 12:34 pm |
  39. Rikki, Fargo, ND

    hahahaha! I'm so glad that I can count on you for some comic relief on a Monday morning!...and I'm sure Luke Perry is very jealous of your hair! Thanks, Jack! Have a good Monday!

    March 30, 2009 at 12:30 pm |
  40. Alyzabeth

    Anderson is a bit more demanding than he seems on TV. And the mansion only has three gift wrapping rooms? How gauche.

    March 30, 2009 at 12:29 pm |
  41. Brandi - bottom of the boot

    'Candi' with an 'i', c'mon!!!! Chris, i know you are out there, do you know what this reminds me of?????

    i would never want to clean a house that big, but then again, if i could afford to buy it, i could afford to pay someone else to clean it. lol

    nah, still way too big and extravagant, i suppose i prefer cozy to luxurious. lol

    have a great day, love!!!

    March 30, 2009 at 12:22 pm |
  42. Nancy

    Love the blog today – just what I needed for a monday.

    And yes, you do have much better hair than Luke Perry. The jealously would have been rampant – probably a good thing you turned the role down.

    Thanks again for the giggle and smile!

    March 30, 2009 at 12:22 pm |
  43. Alicia

    Dear Jack, or is it Jacque now? Anyway, is this the result of 4 hours sleep? Because if it is, I'm going to hire security guards to make sure you never get more than that amount ever again. EVER!! This is the kind of thing Mondays should be made of.

    March 30, 2009 at 12:18 pm |
  44. Pati Mc Camp Hill, PA

    Hello Jack Candi. I knew it all along.

    I have but one humble request...that I be invited to the parties. I will be the one who follows Joan Collins around to make sure that she leaves you alone, all the while plying her with double Dynastini's to get her to dish the dirt. Ew...just the thought of you having an "experience" with her made me shudder. Surely you have moved on to bigger and better things now, right?

    BTW...Luke Perry has got nothing on you! Pshaw.

    I am now off to dig through the archives to locate your stint on TJ Hooker. Did they have videotape back then??? Hmmm....

    March 30, 2009 at 12:16 pm |
  45. Dean Schindler

    Thanks Jack for bringing a smile to my face on this Monday morning. Yes, 150 million may be steep, but you know Candy is going to require some work from her cosmetic surgeon and that is getting to be much more expensive these days. HAHA. Great article.
    Maybe Candy should consider donating the house to assist in the homeless situation that is taking over since the recession has hit...but then again, this would mean she would have to look at others instead of herself...doubtful that will be happening any time soon.

    March 30, 2009 at 12:12 pm |
  46. Kelly

    Jack Gray, you got me in trouble. My professor kicked me out of my history class when i laughed during his lecture (it was the T.J. Hooker part).

    March 30, 2009 at 12:11 pm |
  47. Presley

    56,500 sq. foot mansion.
    One mile is 5,280 feet. So, doing the math, on a Monday, that equates to 10 sq. miles, yes?
    You could have a piece of cake in the kitchen and burn it off by the time you get back to bed. That's just smart planning right there.
    Who needs Jenny Craig.

    XXO ♥

    March 30, 2009 at 12:10 pm |
  48. Cindy

    Jack,
    Yep..I always knew you were the man with the dough! If you can afford the Spelling mansion..then man you definitely don't need to be working at CNN! UMM..well unless you're just trying to see how the other half lives! LOL Which hanging with Mr. Cooper won't really show ya but hey..maybe hangin' with Harvey will! No..Harvey would probably get you into more parties than Coop! Well especially in DC because we all know how much they LOVE their pork! LOL

    So when you move into the the new digs when is the party and are we all invited!? LOL

    Cindy..Ga.

    March 30, 2009 at 12:06 pm |
  49. vanessa from silver spring, MD

    funny blog today. If i had the money, i would buy that mansion.

    March 30, 2009 at 12:04 pm |
  50. Michelle Johnson, Lomita, CA

    Hi Jack, I am laughing so hard when I'm supposed to be working, but I can't resist searching for your blog every morning! How old were you when TJ Hooker was made, about 3? You're not old enough to have played in that show. Still laughing about the pot-bellied pig! As for Candy Spelling's mansion, it looks like something out of Disneyland. Why don't you open an amusement park? lol

    March 30, 2009 at 12:04 pm |