January 9th, 2009
03:30 PM ET

If all else fails just take off with your dry cleaner's purse

[cnn-photo-caption image=http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/2009/images/01/09/art.dry.cleaners.jpg]

Jack Gray
AC360° Associate Producer

Ah, Friday.  The day when Americans say to one another, “have a good weekend.”  Which of course is the polite way of saying “please let this be the night my lottery numbers finally come in so I never have to see you chumps again.”

The looming Powerball jackpot notwithstanding, I am looking forward to my $500 stimulus check from the Obama administration. I had no idea that all it would take to fix the financial crisis was for me to make the minimum payment on my credit card and buy a JetBlue ticket to Cancun.

Of course, President-elect Obama isn’t the first politician to employ this strategy.  I vaguely remember getting a stimulus check from the Bush administration.  I think the amount was $300.  Or maybe it was $600.  All I know is I never should have let Anderson talk me into investing in that Larry King Spaghetti Sauce.  From now on I’m getting all my financial advice from professionals like Elisabeth Hasselbeck and Mickey Rourke.

And, yes, I know the jobless numbers today paint a bleak picture, but there is hope:  We live in a country where ingenuity and problem solving are alive and well.  Because I don’t know about you, but when I when see a dry cleaning customer attempt to resolve a dispute over a blouse by taking off with the dry cleaner’s purse in an attempt to hold it hostage, I can’t help but think that everything is going to be alright.

The economy, however, isn’t the only thing making headlines.  In Illinois, the House of Representatives has voted to impeach Governor Rod Blagojevich and his hair.  Which means we’re just weeks away from the stand-off with police and the obligatory Lifetime movie “Blasphemy and Bangs.”

Meanwhile, Michigan Congressman John Conyers has announced his opposition to Dr. Sanjay Gupta becoming Surgeon General, saying he doesn’t believe Sanjay has the “requisite experience.” Conyers, being that he is a congressman and not a senator, does not have a formal role in the nomination process.  He did, however, stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

Finally, don’t forget this Sunday night at 8:00pm I’ll be live blogging the Golden Globes right here on AC360.com.  Tell your friends, tell your co-workers, tell your estranged aunt to whom you haven’t spoken since she stole your Chevy Lumina.

Because there’s no business like show business.  Except for maybe a Ponzi scheme.

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Filed under: 360° Radar • Economy • Jack Gray • Raw Politics
soundoff (29 Responses)
  1. Rikki, Fargo, ND

    Happy Friday Jack! I think I would rather take financial advice from Anderson than from Elisabeth Hasselbeck. And I hate to say it but the stimulus package isn't going to work...but have fun in Cancun! 🙂

    It was very sweet of Anderson to allow you to use the live blog to blog during the golden globes this weekend...I'm looking forward to it!

    Have a good weekend Jack! 😉

    January 10, 2009 at 11:05 am |
  2. Dave Eisley

    Jack....your wisdom is only preceded by your graciousness and savoir faire.

    January 9, 2009 at 9:27 pm |
  3. lee

    Jack, you gotta get the Wolfbot on the show with you Sunday. Did you see him on Ellen?

    January 9, 2009 at 8:48 pm |
  4. Ratna, New York, NY

    Hi Jack Gray,

    Golden Globes! Interesting!!

    The American culture is so "service providing" oriented, we have all got addicted to pay and receive services and forgot how to do our own chores. Coming from a different country, we still washed our clothes on an old fashioned launder tool with our hands and hung it up in the bright sun and we had time to do this.

    We have been spoiled by luxury, service and the fact that we can afford to buy stuff we can't afford and worry later about payment. The funniest of all: all this is available while free health coverage is still unavailable. Good Health is not a comodity to purchase, you know?

    I think Dr. Sanjay Gupta is right for the job, but he will have to sacrifice his job at CNN and make more time for this, I think. People who mention "requisite experience" are just full of bull.
    At what point does one get the oppertunity to gain this "requisite experience" if you don't get an oppertunity to acquire it in the first place?!! Bull!

    I would not take financial investment from Elisabeth Hasselbeck either unless she promotes "The Look For Less." Seriously, you took advise from the Anderson Cooper and on Spaghetti Sauce investment. How funny! 🙂

    January 9, 2009 at 7:29 pm |
  5. Helen, Reading, UK

    You caught me out Jack, two blogs today, get you! Mind you, Blago's giving you plenty of material. The man is deranged! I would love to join you live for your Golden Globes blog, but that pesky time difference means I'll have to be content with reading it Monday at work! Hey, here's a thought, why don't you pop over to London and live blog the BAFTAS? You can stay at my place, I'll bake a cake, you just bring Sammy and a couple of wine boxes and we're good to go! Of course, if you wanted to bring Anderson along, I'm sure I could accommodate him too.. Have a great weekend all x x

    January 9, 2009 at 7:13 pm |
  6. Don, WA

    I can buy 500 things at the dollar store! Woo-Hoo!! I think I'll just stock up on outdated shampoo (that goes bad?) and second rate packs of dishwashing sponges, and one-armed t-shirts that read: "I Graduated from the School of Hard Knocks!"...and...well, they have other stuff there too.

    January 9, 2009 at 7:07 pm |
  7. Annie Kate

    Hey Jack,

    TGIF to you too! To me that always has meant two days where I could sleep in and ignore everyone around me. It always works out great that way too – until my brothers come over to give me a hard time about something like my car – their favorite expression is that when a light comes on in the car it is not a good thing; a problem with the car is not going to announce itself with a gong – pay attention! No, I don't know much about cars – that is what brothers are for.

    I hope Sammie has a good weekend – plenty of menthols and drinks and a good run in the park. Will she be on the blog Sunday night too or is she just going to be your designated speller? Ought to be fun either way!!

    Oh, and stay away from Anderson and his stock advice – he'll have you investing in gummi bears next.

    January 9, 2009 at 6:39 pm |
  8. L Griffiths Australia

    Lifetime movie “Blasphemy and Bangs staring as Governor Rod Blagojevich and his hair – Tom Cruise.... how many reason would there be not to watch this movie?

    January 9, 2009 at 5:35 pm |
  9. Jennifer - Michigan

    @Renee: Hope you make it in! It's a fun show to watch – I'm crossing my fingers for you.

    January 9, 2009 at 5:01 pm |
  10. sharon from Indy

    The stimulus package seems somewhat of a joke to me. Hey, like everyone else, I would like to have a few extra hundred dollars in my wallet, but I feel the package is a pacifier rather an a economic boost.

    The solution is not to give a teenager their allowance after they just wreck the family car. Americans need to learn how to save money not just spend it. Retailers are not my personal friends nor are the Chinese that make most products made for Walmart.

    Also, is corruption by government officials so commonplace that we are becoming numb to it? But, thank goodness to Governor Rod Blagojevich. This will make a great Oliver Stone movie.

    Otherwise, the news would be full of the inauguration blitz to January 20.

    Have a hard working, lack of sleep weekend.

    January 9, 2009 at 5:00 pm |
  11. Fay - CA

    Jack, I haven't watched the Golden Globes in years, but the prospect of you skewering celebrities and all their foolishness is too hard to resist. I'm there.

    January 9, 2009 at 4:59 pm |
  12. Megan Dresslar - Shoreline, WA

    Hellooo Jack!!!!
    Have a great weekend again!!! I can't wait join Golden Globes this weekend! Hope you have great day!!!! Please get rest and sleep this weekend!

    January 9, 2009 at 4:50 pm |
  13. Renee

    @Jennifer: I have sent 2 tapes to DOND! I have 2 amazing ideas for the show. Cross your fingers! I need some extra cash. If I make it on, maybe I'll ask Jack to be part of my "family" audience.

    @ Jack: You are too wrapped up in Rod's hair. You must have some funky hair fetish or something. Were you a stylist before AC360 producer?

    I am not a big award show person but I guess I will blog with you if I have a chance. I hope you are polished up on your runway fashions and jewels. You do know the difference between Harry Winston and David Yurman, don't you?

    January 9, 2009 at 4:26 pm |
  14. holly, overland park , ks

    TGIF, and $500 isnt going to make a dent in myyy bills. time to look up the forms for a personal bailout..at least enough for several boxes of wine.
    have a quality weekend!
    ps.Rahm Emmanuel is hot.

    January 9, 2009 at 4:19 pm |
  15. Hannah Marner

    -rolls eyes-

    Sure, like that particular Congressman's opinion matters to the world at large. Oy.

    If they actually make a Lifetime movie out of that, and hey, it's Lifetime – they probably will – I will be sure to watch anything but that. Though, the thought occurs to me that it might make for a spectacular drinking game....

    And to Presley: I will gladly take your snow. I love it, and there's not enough of it where I live in California. And I love the poll! You've got me on there in the "Of course! Absolutely!" category, right?

    January 9, 2009 at 4:18 pm |
  16. xtina, chicago IL

    Funny ! Did u see Blago's hair after a run? it's all downward spiky and poufy in the front like a 1980s MTV look.

    January 9, 2009 at 4:06 pm |
  17. Dulcie

    Happy Friday, Jack! And by that I mean, 'what a welcome relief to the gloom & doom'!

    I'll be opening a fresh box of wine for tonight's show. Maybe by the time it airs, I'll be enough in the bag to really enjoy Floor Crew Friday.

    January 9, 2009 at 1:30 pm |
  18. Kristen-University Park, PA

    Jack you are very funny, I just might have to check your blog out on Sunday. I'm sure you will have some funny stuff.

    January 9, 2009 at 1:19 pm |
  19. Michelle

    I also invested in my future retirement mega millions jackpot.
    I am already in I will be back on Monday mode. Hey Anderson's
    advice could not be any worse than Jim Cramer.

    January 9, 2009 at 1:13 pm |
  20. Presley

    *does the begrudged "omg" sigh*
    Great, a Michigan Congressman, just swell, maybe he's just bitter that the Lions went friggin' 0-16 this season.
    Meanwhile, us Michiganders in the Southeastern region have a lovely Snow Storm coming. Yea, peachy.
    It's the liquor store for booze and lottery tickets for me tonight. Then hoo-flippin'-ray, I get to shovel tomorrow!!!! Party!!!!

    Thankfully, I have Sunday night on the schedule with Jack Gray and AC360 bloggers. If the Globes are anything like last night's Critic's Choice Awards, there will be more bitter Angelina Jolie shots when she doesn't win.
    Good times Good times.

    TGIF Jack
    XXO ♥
    p.s. Rahm Emanuel is officially HOT, I did a Poll.

    January 9, 2009 at 1:10 pm |
  21. Helen T

    Sarah Palin thinks there was a "class issue" in the way she was treated by the media and is now comparing herself to Caroline Kennedy. I think she might be right. Sarah Palin must have skipped a few classes during her formative years; particularly the ones on foreign policy and the importance of reading.

    January 9, 2009 at 1:05 pm |
  22. Lance - Chicago

    Hey Jack,
    I am with you on the Cancun trip; maybe we can get a group of people together and charter the whole JetBlue fleet! ... margaritas on the beach anyone?

    Good to see that 'Blago got the thumbs up on the impeachment ... one step closer to cleaning up 'Crook County' Illinois. Now I just wish they would find a way to force the man to get a decent haircut. As a Chicago resident I can say I won't miss seeing his reverse mullet shaking hands during the St. Patty's Day parade.

    January 9, 2009 at 1:04 pm |
  23. lee

    Jack, for Sunday night, are you thinking about some filler music or something? I don't know – maybe you can do something with the songs "Friends in Low Places" or "2 Pina Colada's" where you, Sammy, can sing the chorus, the viewers can join in as they wish.
    Something along those lines, to get the viewers more involved.

    January 9, 2009 at 12:56 pm |
  24. Dee from CT

    When's the Cancun trip? I assume Sammy is on board as well – can't get better than drinking it up in Cancun ...

    January 9, 2009 at 12:27 pm |
  25. Jennifer - Michigan

    Hi Jack,
    Happy Friday – Funny post!!! What a day.....I'm looking forward to this evening (after the kids are in bed), to watching Deal or No Deal with Howie Mandell and a stiff bloody mary. Nothing like mindless TV on a Friday night, can't wait. Last week, a little old farmer lady turned down $117k last week to test her luck, I'm curious about what her outcome will be. They say your first offer is usually your best offer. She was so cute – I hope she did well. Anyway, have a great weekend. Hope you win that big powerball jackpot!

    January 9, 2009 at 12:20 pm |
  26. Lilibeth

    Hi Jack, Happy Friday to you! Mr. Conyers can say all he wants but I believe Sanjay will make a great Surgeon General. Actually, even before the election took place, I thought that he would be a good candidate for the job. I guess Obama and I think alike!

    I don’t usually watch the Golden Globes, so I’m afraid I won’t be live-blogging. But I’ll watch the Oscars for sure.

    Have a great weekend!

    Edmonds, Washington

    January 9, 2009 at 12:15 pm |
  27. Cindy

    Oh Jack...don't they teach you anything there at 360!? I mean we all know that when someone says "Have a nice weekend" that they really mean "Get the he** out of my face and I'm glad that I won't have to see ya for a few days." LOL So next time Anderson says that to ya just remember he's telling ya off! Hey...he tells us all that every week too huh!? HMM...should we all bum rush him and make him say uncle? LOL

    One thing is for sure...with Blago impeached that means we'll have to find another clown to take up our time but with congress in session that should be easy! Hey...you know you'll miss those wispy bangs blowin' in the breeze in all of your dreams! You just wish you had hair like that! Admit it Jack!! LOL

    I'm with ya on the stimulus check...all I've got to say is... where my check at!? And like you I think I'll help the economy by buying a ticket outta this place.


    January 9, 2009 at 12:12 pm |
  28. Pamina

    Hi Jack,
    I hope the right numbers come up for the Powerball, that would certainly stimulate the economy! The Impeachment of Blago and his bangs should be a good diversion for the next few months.
    I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last weekend, so I think I should have a vote in whether Sanjay gets to be Surgeon General- I think he should!
    Looking forward to Sunday night!
    Have a good weekend! 🙂

    January 9, 2009 at 12:11 pm |
  29. Lorie Ann, Buellton, California

    Good Friday to you Jack. I guess we have to be hopeful that anyone can still afford to GO to the dry cleaners!
    I guess there really is no business like Show Biz..They can lose their shirt and still have an audience to watch them parade down the red carpet in 1000.00 dollar gowns. Gotta love them.

    Lorie Ann, Buellton, Calif.

    January 9, 2009 at 12:10 pm |