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October 10th, 2008
11:28 AM ET

If you call now, we’ll send you this lovely tote bag as our gift to you

Jack Gray
AC360 Associate Producer

Finally. It’s about time. No, Anderson has not agreed to have my parakeet on the program to do its Larry King impression: “Wichita, you’re on with Suzanne Somers. Go ahead.” I’m referring to the point in the presidential campaign where the candidates bring primetime television down to the level of that guy who hocks his get-rich-quick real estate seminar at 3a.m.

You’ve probably heard by now: Barack “I’ve got so much extra campaign cash that I think I might check out the spa that those AIG executives went to” Obama has bought a half-hour of network airtime at 8p.m. on Wednesday, October 29th. As of this writing he’s made deals with CBS and NBC, with additional networks possible.

On CBS he’ll be pre-empting a show called, “Gary Unmarried.” Yeah, I hadn’t heard of it either. A quick Google search tells me it’s a new sitcom about a guy who has to juggle his busy life….blah, blah, blah…wake me when it’s canceled.

On NBC Obama will be pre-empting the new version of “Knight Rider.” That’s right, “Knight Rider.” As in, the talking Pontiac that spent 1982-1986 chatting up a storm with David Hasselhoff. Maybe ABC can compete by bringing back “Mr. Belvedere.”

For me, watching a political infomercial for a half-hour ranks right up there with getting my wisdom teeth removed by that guy at the park who calls every dog he encounters “Spartacus.” And that’s nothing personal against Obama. I wouldn’t watch McCain, either.

Do you remember Ross Perot back in 1992 with his paid programming? Those easels and charts - I get chills just thinking about them.

If I’m going to watch an infomercial you can bet it’s going to be the one where Ron Popeil demonstrates his Showtime Rotisserie Grill. You know: “Set it and forget it!” Don’t act like you’ve never watched it. We both know you’re lying.

The thing is, of course, if the campaign continues on its current path - which is to say Senator Obama widening his lead over Senator McCain in nearly all key battleground states - Obama could spend that half-hour of television time reading names out of the phone book in a faux Madonna-esque British accent and he’d still win in a landslide.

That said, as we all know, anything can happen between now and Election Day. For example, John McCain could very well buy his own block of television time.

Just, please, Senator McCain, don’t make America miss another episode of the new “Knight Rider.”


Filed under: 360° Radar • Jack Gray
soundoff (24 Responses)
  1. Annie Kate

    Great post Jack – you always make me smile with your posts. I'm like you though – I don't plan on watching a 30 minute political infomercial either – even though regular programming is bad I can read a book and get more out of that than just about anything on tv (except 360 of course).

    Annie Kate
    Birmingham AL

    October 10, 2008 at 10:58 pm |
  2. Sharon from Indy

    Jack:
    Thank goodness for the remote control. I can switch to HDTV or the Discovery Channel when Obama and McCain block out hours of time on the mainstream TV channels.

    Pundits rule.

    October 10, 2008 at 9:07 pm |
  3. Terri from Atlanta

    All I can say is, "Sham, Wow!"

    (If you've seen the commercial, you'll understand that. If not,
    consider yourself lucky)

    Worst infomercial ever...."buy this spray for your head and no
    one will know you're bald".....who bought that?!!!

    October 10, 2008 at 9:01 pm |
  4. Connie

    Is this an example of how prudently Obama will be spending taxpayer's money? Couldn't his campaign spend the money on a few used SUV's that a middle class would now like to exchange for an environmentally and financially beneficial hybrid which in trun might allow GM and Ford to keep their plants open?

    October 10, 2008 at 8:02 pm |
  5. Phebe

    So you're being threatened with firing? Did word somehow leak about the plans to pitch Jack360 to Atlanta?

    I just filled out my early voting ballot this afternoon. Now that I've voted I am free to concentrate on the abysmal state of my finances without the distraction of politics. If only there was a news channel for early voters. Think about it, no one trying to influence or spin, no commercials, no infomercials, just news. Sort of like being transported to November 5th.

    October 10, 2008 at 7:17 pm |
  6. Tammy, Berwick, LA

    Apparently there's not a lot of confidence in the polls that he's taking out a half hour infomercial to boost his numbers. It's not over until it's over. Win or lose, the McCain-Palin supporters will have the last laugh anyway. It's only appropriate that this is being placed during the time slot of a sitcom.

    October 10, 2008 at 6:29 pm |
  7. Wisdom

    I agree with Terra...

    Both are boring... aren't equiped to fix our problems...

    Just sell your stuff... get cash... and be ready for the largest tax increase in history... because it's coming...

    and if you think it only affects the rich... guess again... the rich hire the poor and the rich don't take pay cuts... they just cut pay roll...

    October 10, 2008 at 5:55 pm |
  8. Arachnae

    Okay, Jack – the cult is back on. Buying the domain name now. What do you think of TheCultofJack.com? Or maybe JacktheBoyGod?

    October 10, 2008 at 5:54 pm |
  9. David

    First off, The first comment from Cindy, she is a riot, what a funny lady! She seems like one of those angry mobsters from the Mc Cain rally, anyways, love your blog and thats for the amusement.

    October 10, 2008 at 5:34 pm |
  10. Terra Hoskins

    God, I can't wait for this election to be over. I'm with you, Jack, I wouldn't watch either candidate. Especially when I'm behind on Mad Men. The debates were boring enough. Wake me up when an economist is running for president.

    October 10, 2008 at 5:30 pm |
  11. Stacy

    Ruh-roh. Jack has angried-up his comment section. And just when he was starting to get groupies too. Tis a shame.

    I think some people need to take a deep breath, and perhaps see if anyone is selling a sense of humor on eBay.

    Thank you Jack, for the always amusing post and for reminding me why I avoid most network television. Oh, and a Mr. Belvedere reference? Well played.

    October 10, 2008 at 5:21 pm |
  12. Fay, CA

    Uh oh, it looks like Jack's been busted by the boss–will we have to start a petition to save him? 😉

    October 10, 2008 at 5:11 pm |
  13. Kristien,Antwerp, Belgium

    Oh Jack, I think you hit a nerve with some people...

    Here in Belgium I don't get to see any of the political ads you're talking about and we don't have the new Knight Rider on (yet).
    I'm not sure I would watch either, though I would probably give an Obama ad a try, but one from McCain certainly not! (and Knight Rider without The Hoff...nah)

    Thanks Jack, as always I enjoyed reading your post!

    October 10, 2008 at 4:52 pm |
  14. anderson cooper

    i'm with minou and alex. You've gone too far Jack, way too far. If only i knew who you are i'd fire you.

    October 10, 2008 at 4:46 pm |
  15. liz

    How dare you try to joke about something this serious?!

    I get so angry when you try to be flippant about politicians' deliberate attempts to sway the clueless, uncommitted voters while maintaining the passion of people who misinterpret then overzealously respond to your silly little blogs.

    And why take it out on Mr Belvedere? Have you no shame?

    October 10, 2008 at 4:27 pm |
  16. Handle Bar

    YAY! Jack's back!

    love the posts! your writing are the apple of my eye!

    thanks!

    October 10, 2008 at 4:17 pm |
  17. bryan

    That was a good read Jack, its refreshing to see everyone is not under an "Oblabla" gag order. Here we have a prime example of the Liberal Love machine in action as Barry spends and spends and spends, but tells Hillary his hands are tied and we are in 'Prudent times"
    Fannie Mae money only goes so far, Geez didn't anyone hear of 'inflation?"
    Classic

    October 10, 2008 at 3:57 pm |
  18. Kent, Illinois

    Yeah I remember Ross Perot's charts. Everyone went to sleep real fast. Didn't matter if he was right or wrong..........he was boring. I'll watch Obama's 1/2 hour show. Don't tell me the GOP doesn't have some surprises for all of us right before the election..........they do.

    October 10, 2008 at 2:39 pm |
  19. Jennifer - Michigan

    Hi Jack, Your post is a hoot! Very funny! It's a good pick-me-up after a rough week watching the stock market drop and drop, where is it going to stop? Looks like we all have to be in it for the long haul, what a pain! Anyway, thanks for the laugh. Have a good day.

    October 10, 2008 at 2:26 pm |
  20. Alex

    Jack –

    It seems to me that you, Anderson and 360 staff with Drew Griffin onboard have developed double standards here. First, you and Cooper need to chill out. Second, and most important, Obama can do whatever he wants to do – it's his money(in case you forgot about it, people gonna vote on November 4th and want to listen to his 30-minutes speech on Oct. 29). So, get off his back!

    Alex.

    Obama – Biden * 2008

    October 10, 2008 at 2:26 pm |
  21. Fay, CA

    Jack, it's great to see you posting more often–with all the bad news going around these days, we could use a few laughs here and there.

    There are times when an infomercial (the Ron Popeil type) can be more entertaining than anything the networks have to offer–and if they're bringing back Knight Rider, they've really run out of ideas. I will be tuning into The Obama Show when it airs.

    October 10, 2008 at 2:05 pm |
  22. Presley

    YAY JACK'S BACK! TGIF.

    I have cable service and Obama has a temporary channel right now running 24/7. No, I haven't watched, I know it's there though.
    I don't watch "Knight Rider", no one is as righteous as the Hoff.

    Come on Jack, admit it, Vince the wonky Sham Wow Guy would be awesomeness. 30 minutes of how the Germans make good stuff and he's got all day to do it.
    Or Billy Mays YELLING AT YOU to get the stains out and fix your wood floors and YOU'LL SAVE THOUSANDS ON REPAIR COSTS WITH MIGHTY PUTTY!

    XXO

    October 10, 2008 at 2:03 pm |
  23. Minou, New York City

    So what's your problem, Jack? The fact that Obama bought air-time for an infomercial or that his infomercial is followed by crap programming? It's his money,he can spend it however he likes it....and no one is forcing you to tune in, right? Sounds like much ado about nothing to me, dude.

    October 10, 2008 at 1:58 pm |
  24. Cindy

    Jack,
    I'm with ya! I don't see why Obama is buying TV time! Who is going to watch it? OK...fess up, you news media type will just so you can tell about it on the next days show. But as for me, I think I've seen enough of his lies and deceits on the debates.

    And just so you know...this election isn't over so you all need to stop giving the win to Obama already. You're going to look dumb when he loses.

    Cindy...Ga.

    October 10, 2008 at 1:49 pm |