Do you see this finger it was just up my nose im going for green all the way even for lunch.

I gotta tell you this is a green book and it is going to make me tons of green backs

"Hey Barrack, Pull my finger"

The answer is up there...

Heaven forbid if I shall ever be wrong!

Look...God doesn't care whether or not I live better than 97% of the People on this Planet, as long as His Message on Global Warming is given (albeit not Freely) to the Masses.

"It's not nice to fool Mother Nature", but com'on doesn't someone believe me Global Warming is real !!

You know . . if you had elected me nine years ago, I would have had this problem solved by now.

I predict that the sales of my new book will follow the lead of this finger - and shoot WAY up.

Phone home.

I knew that Anderson would make a new Planet in Peril.

One more time Kanye and you will be evicted from the BB house!

I knew that Anderson would make a new Planet in Peril. I won't lose!

Remember! I warned you, the choice is ours to make now.

Remember, it's not just the internet, I also invented Pizza and Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots.

Yes bears, oh! I mean the polar bears no myself

Al Gore demonstrates how gases rise up, using Botox as an example.

Yes, I will agree. Joe Lieberman was one of my biggest mistakes - if not the biggest - that I made in 2000.

"This little LIGHT of mine, I'm gonna make it Shine, make it shine." Al Gore sings a childhood song to make his point....

Im going to run for president just one more time in 2012 .

"Now listen up children, it was my choice which tie style to wear today. I took requests, but I can only tie a Prince Albert."

Anthony- MN

"Blue does not go with black. One more inconvenient truth."

Victoria
Salem, OR

No, Katherine Harris has yet to apologize to me or the American people.

Al Gores new "green" way to check the wind speed and direction, or at least he thinks so, he created it you know.

Now look here, Mr. Cooper. I know you're just here to try to steal the key to my Lock Box, but I'm onto you, so don't even try it!

Al Gore performing the Monty Python sketch – "And now a man with a tape recorder in his nose." (R.I.P. Graham Chapman)

" and I want to assure everyone here that my hair products are eco-friendly!"

Mario Mageras, Williamsburg, VA

About Election 2000, my campaign manager, Donna Brazile, said "it's the Monica, stupid." Suffice it to say that Donna has not managed another campaign that I am aware.

I think we can do better and we should change the expression "carbon footprint" to " carbon fingerprint."

Number one thing to remember, 'I' invented the internet.

"Did you hear the one about the Gorilla? The ONE gorilla"

Could someone turn the temperature up in here, I'm trying to sell a few books.

My book will be at the top of the New York Times bestseller's list. It's not exaggeration, just an inconvenient truth....

"If you look up, you will see that the sky is in fact falling."

That is an awfully big hole in the ozone layer.

First things first, Keeping your doors open with the air conditioner running will help cool down the climate.

if you were sin^2 and i was cos^2, together we'd be 1.

The climate IS changing. For proof of that, you need to look no further than last night's tsunami that swept through Virginia and New Jersey.

Yes, I came here by Private Jet, but it was just a small one!!

Phoenix, AZ

"I bet you can't eat just one."

You are a naughty, naughty Ewok

I served my Nobel, I know my Nobel - Nobel is a friend of mine. And Mr President, you're no Nobel !

If Hillary had won the nomination, I would have been vice president again in a different Clinton administration. On the upside, down the road I would have had another shot at the presidency

Do you know the carbon footprint of the cell phone you didn't shut off...AND INTERRUPTED MY SPEECH..BILL?

Norma Lee New York, NY

I told you before! I am an inventor. Climate change is for real! My plan to solve the climate crisis is my invention. I am so right on this one.

Before starting his speech, Gore advises Kanye to please keep seated because OUR CHOICE has nothing do with Taylor Swift or Beyonce.

The day I said that I had invented the the internet I 'd been tired because I'd been up all night inventing Facebook.

Al Gore cautions us to beware of the Ewoks, who chop down our trees and are trying to reproduce in mass quantities.

The only thing worse than global warming will be the chill in the White House if the Republicans take over the legislature!

Look , there are ways for alternative energy such as solar, wind, geothermal, biomass and nuclear power . Hence, my Nobel Peace Prize–

Riverview, Mi

"Just give me one good reason why you couldn't watch me on Letterman last night."

In celebration of Seasame Street , today's speech is brought to you by the letters 'A' and "L" and by the number 1.

After winning The Nobel Prize, an Academy Award. an Emmy and a Grammy, i figured why not a Pulitzer?

Cameron Cox
Winnipeg, Canada

Meanwhile cross town a group of climatologists report that 90% of global warming is caused by Al Gore's hot air.

And I intend on campaigning against global warming until I can't make any more money off it.

Read my lips....I"DID" invent the internet!

Remember: There is one, and ONLY ONE, right answer to solving the current climate crisis - and MY BOOK has it all figured out.

Al Gore takes a moment to sing "One Short Day" from the musical Wicked, as a Tony is the only award he has yet to win.

I'm doing a group sobriety test...how many fingers am i holding up?

I know my tie looks blue...but its actually"green"!

Rush Limbaugh called me a tree hugger once...Once.

"long story short, I sell my green stocks and live happily ever after. As for you lot, good luck!"

"Green is good."

Cameron Cox
Winnipeg, Canada

"You better watch your carbon footprint
You better not pollute
You better recycle
I'm tellin' you why
Big Al Gore will take you down"

(to the tune of Santa Claus is Coming to Town)

Ok ....I'll explain Net Neutrality just one more time!

I get the impression that the majority of the population has a skeptical opinion on global warming. It should be obvious to everyone the severity of the situation. Take the forest fires for one. Twenty years ago a fire larger that 100,000 acres was a rarity today it is considered to be common. not counting on all the other natural catastrophies such as the pollution in the waters the over fishing etc. My guess is that the change is comming at a slow enough rate that people don't notice it but if we had all the change at one time we would be worrying about it.
I hear things like it isn't happening etc. then I think of that small sheep rancher and his predictions. I can almost hear the jeers and comments at the local coffee house. Look at that fool NOAH building a boat in the middle of the dessert. Doesn't he see where he lives.

I invented this hair.

I would remind the young man in the first row that recycling my book would be carbon neutral while burning it would not be.

This is just the begining of us Going Rogue..Huh...Going Rouge...Sorry Sarah

I've got Anderson Cooper's haircut. I've got Regis Philbin's hair color. I've got Jack Nicholson's eyebrows. But, this finger is all mine, baby.

No no no, what I'm suggesting is much more expensive to our economy.

Awaiting Moderation...now There's a Concept

I'm Al Gore and Windows 7 was MY idea.

Wat did I ever do to u people, can't u all just leave me alone?

If I could have gotten one more hanging shad.

Two amorous microphones had the best seats at Al Gore's book launch.

Not one tree was harmed in the making of this book.

The Inconvenient Truth is, I lied.

Tim Gibson
San Diego, CA

Mark my words....there will be a new moon.....soon

In 2012, we all go up in smoke.

I want to make this point very clear!...I am not doing a reality show with Jon Gosselin!

If Heene's balloon sailed any higher, it would have exploded into the ozone layer, one buttered kernel at a time.

I'm not Pro Choice!!! I believe it should be Our Choice!!!

For one easy payment of $26.99, you too can help save the planet!

You need proof about our climate crisis?
I'll find some and bring em to ya!

"Mrs. Palin, please...."

Thats a vicious rumor! I will never Dance with any Stars!

The best way to save our enviorment is to use our natural resorses, like trees from the rainforest, to make millions of books about how to save our enviorment.

You know everyone you really should be saving the earth....I am not kidding!!!!

I'm the 1st and only climate whisperer!

"...first of all, the Flintstones are NOT a factual historical record....."

I'm having a launch party for my book, not a tea party!

Everything about this book is recyled.

Let me "recount" the facts about our climate crisis just one more time.

"Ok everyone. Stay awake!!"

A Plan to Solve the Climate Crisis is a lot of hot air.

I don't care what wikipedia reads, " i invented the internet!"

"i will be surprised if i sell one copy of this garbage oh i mean my book"

Don't forget: Climate is and was our first choice, The Democratic party's sake is our next issue.
Neilu, Fair Oaks, Ca

Black and Blue does no always mean bruised.

Don't forget: Climate is and was our first choice, The Democratic party's sake is our next issue.

What brand rollerblades am i wearing?
Sonic!,

True Obama won a the Noble Prize too, but I won a Grammy!

Just wait one minute, I do my part for the economy. I fly around in my corporate jet, my electric bill is four times that of the average homeowner, I drive an Escalade or in a limo. Oh wait this is a global change convention, heck yea I believe all of YOU need to do YOUR part to save the Earth.

Yes it is our choice, but your choice to read my book.

"I'm all for reducing our CO2 footprint and all, but there is no way I'm giving up my big house and my steak!"

Thank God for this climate crisis! Because of that I don't even know what recession means!

"...You better watch out...you better not cry....Santa Claus is coming to town....he knows when you are littering, he knows, make no mistake....he's watching all those polar bears...so go green for goodnes sake...."

Once upon a time there was a planet called earth.

Jeannette Kucan
Pinehurst,NC

Be careful, there may not be room for you on the last iceberg. You better wear a wetsuit.

I am actually Goral, master of Alpha Centauri! Earthlings, help make your planet like my paradise among the stars.

Too bad Al will not run for Pres. again?

The entire book was printed on recycled absentee ballots!

Al Gore shows Florida voters which finger they should have used when punching their ballots.

It is Green book, but I am not going to tell you how many trees have been cut down to print this book.

"Someone up there is watching, I'm warning you"

It is exhausting listening to all the Gorey details.

Al Gore poses for Madame Tussaud's, then promptly melts from the effects of global warming.

Is it anybody's business but my own what I do with my own planet? Why should I care about those not yet born and who are you to inflict your morality on me?

Getting Pro-Life in your dotage, Mister Gore?

"My God, have I aged"

Watch this – I can touch my hairline with my eyebrows!

Look at my eyebrows, they are drawn on!

You couldn't make it exclusively an e-book and save a tree or three. Hypocrite much?

Nice to see Al hasn't let defeat go to his head.

You're supposed to use the RIGHT hand and stick your thumb out more.

Thanks for not making it a Kindle book and saving a few trees.

He is concerned about hot air. Ironic… or moronic?

Why shouldn't I double up on the Nobel Prize?

Spit out your gum this instant.

Al Glaureate.

Yeah, we know. It's not nice to fool Mother Nature!

Yes, my new house is built into the top of a mountain. You're surprised?

Psst. Mr. Gore. The podium is clear. Everyone can see what you're doing with the other hand.

What do you do about your beach house on the Delaware Bay?
Is it going to be in the water soon and how do I prevent it?
It has been there forever but I will probably be gone by the time it is under water. It has a sand done in front of it to protect it. Camille

(1) It's a green book as it is completely biodegradable.I mean looked at all the green space I created by cutting down all those trees to make all theses copies of my book..
(2) I need the money.
(3) If you don't buy it I'll run again.

Can you kiss my boo-boo and make it all better. Egad, I sound like Bill.

"No, wait a minute. That was not me, that was Bill"

"Now, one step at a time, we're going to go over the choreography for the big musical number in 'An Inconvenient Truth 2: We Finally Got a Bigger Scissor Lift' "

Less words. More photovoltaics.

I even recycle my 'personal methane,' if you know what I mean.

Dang. I thought the Nobel thing was only awarded posthumously.

No , Clinton, not I, was chosen as the judge for miss kankle USA, i am dissapointed I was not chosen

...with a raise of the brows and hand gesture, VP Gore signals the guy by the thermostat for added effect during his speech

"I mean what I say when I say what I mean and you all know what I mean...", says Al Gore, looking awfully mean.

I don't know..........it does seem that i have green fingers,

First thing I am going to do is......get rid of all those dang cows

Now look at my finger. You're getting sleepy. Now when I count to three you will believe there are no more polar bears.

Barack, remember no carbon footprints. GOP is green with envy.

Yes global warming is real. No, I'm not trading my hamburger for a veggie burger.

Sing it with me... 'If you think the environment is defective/call Albert A. Gore/Psyience Detective!

With global warming my investment portfolio is headed nowhere but up.