Its friday the 13th, beware, beware!!!

Hocus pocus whoosh.....the recession is over!!

Did i put enough flags behind me to show how patriotic I am?

Abra cadabra.....the stimulus bill is passed!!!!

'Double, double toil and trouble; fire burn and cauldron bubble!"

Republicans....you are getting sleepy, sleeeppyyy. When I clap my hands you will wake up and eagerly support the stimulus bill!!

Pelosi, Now calm down I no this plan helps nothing but we are up for re-election in 2010

Repeat after me..
"I am the boss!
"I am the magician.
Only I can make it happen."

"No more cheap suits, Oh, It's Friday the 13th"

Sorry, we Italians always speak with our hands!

Let me heal the negative aura of the House Republicans.

Let there be agreement and bipartisanship on Firday the 13th!

Shhhhhhhh! Did I just hear the red phone ring?

see the power i have i can levitate this sign

I'm gonna get ya....

Leaving it up to Imagination, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi tells Reporters "This is how much I support the Stimulus Package."

Hail to the Chief

'She' who laughs last laughs best..

Reporters, you are getting sleepy, sleepy, when I clap my hands you will awake and only report positive news about the economy!

"Don't cry for me, Wall Street. I'm already broke."

Now Repeat after me- "The Stimulus package will work, The Stimulus package will work" ....I think they are believing it.

Don't panic, don't panic! Yes, this is still the United States of America!

Calm DOWN everyone!!!!

Calm down, dear reporters!
I bought gifts of Valentine's Day for everyone!

see no tricks up my sleeves!

Calm down!!!!!!!
Tomorrow's a new day!

Okay, okay, okay....shhhhhh...don't say anything to the Republicans. Let's play a practical joke and act like their vote matters.

"Now Now if you all just calm down and form an orderly line, you will all recieve your bailout money"

Laura
Diyala Province
Iraq

'Do not asdjust yor TVs, we control the vertical, we control the horizontal. You will be advised of our intentions for OUR country over the next few years"!!!
'THe Outer Limits indeed!!!

American people,
Never say never!!!

If you don't get this one right I will strangle you. This is a stimulus bill, not a spending bill.

I'm using my imaginary calculator to add up the total stimulus bill.

Hey Boehner! Guess which hand has your tax cuts in it?

" I said quiet!, and I mean quiet!"

Down bankers! We have to follow Dog Show rules - I'll run you around the rotunda one at a time.

"And look, there's nothing up my sleeve...Now watch me pull a trillion dollars out of thin air!'

You're getting sleepy.
Very sleepy.
Now repeat after me.

It's all the medias fault.
Anderson Cooper started it all.

ohhhhhhhhh you are all falling into a deep sleep. When you wake up the recession will be over. Ok, well maybe not but it was worth the try.

I will lay hands on the economy and it will get better so sit down Republicans and send money.

In what's seen as a new low in partisan politics, Nancy Pelosi mocks John McCain by showing the maximum height he can raise his arms.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi speaks to reporters:
Calm down!!!
President Obama must understand business is business!

I said take me to your leader, not take me to the theatre.

And the best part? For a limited time, everybody can trade in their $40 government digital tv voucher for a FREE FLAG!!!

Watch my hands, don't pay attention to that object behind the curtain, I am the real wizard!

Those who are not superstitious, please remain seated!!!!!!

Now calm down everyone... I know this bailout isn't perfect, but we're already starting on the third one and I promise it will be much better.

The Speaker endeavors to cast a spell on the press corps. “The stimulus package contains no pork… The stimulus package contains no pork…”

Not to be outdone by President Obama, Pelosi does her own dance to Beyonce's "Single Ladies"

Mike B.
Socttsville, NY

Okay now, when I snap my fingers, you'll all wake up and think that this Stimulus bill is actually going to work.

David L., San Francisco, CA

Please bare with me. My nails are still wet.
Kim,
Harrisonburg, va

Settle down folks! The stimulus bill has passed both the Senate and the House, however, we still need the Chinese to actually come up with the cash before we can start spending.

You do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around, that's what its all about!!!

And, a one, and, a two. Wait, where's my baton?

GENTLEMEN,
How much mess!

Don't bite the hand that feeds you.

You put your spending in, you pull your spending out, you put your spending in and you shake it all about, you do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around, that's what its all about!!

I love it when you call me Big Mom-ma
Throw your hands in the air, if youse a true player

I dont like this sign, its so blue.

The ever superstitious Nancy Pelosi attempting to gain some last minute republican votes

Please stay seated folks, the punch and pie comes after I get done speaking.

Taos NM

You add your pork in, you take your pork out, you throw your pork back in and you shake it all about, you do the hokey pokey and you hope no one finds out, that's what it's all about

"Down, down, down goes the recession!!! Feel the power in these hands!!!!"

Settle down all ye Republicans, there is something in the Stimulus Bill for everyone

Where's my Blackberry!?!?

You're getting sleepy, sleepy. When I lower my hands, you'll have nothing but good things to say about the administration. One, two, three.... awake!

Oh say can you see the new day dawning?

I am about to make this sign float in mid air before your very eye's

To stimulate and improve this economy we need to do it like my plastic surgeon one lift at a time.

Settle down, settle down

You put your left hand in,
you put your left hand out
and you shake it all about,
you do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself about
that what it's all about!!!!

Have faith, everyone. I will lay my hands upon the economy, and all will be well.

You put the tax cuts in, you pull the tax cuts out, you put the cuts back in but the GOP still backs out, you do the hokey pokey and you try to work it out, that's what it's all about!

Hocus Pocus. Republican's you're all out of focus.

I can catch this shoe......no problemo.

Behold! My very own manually operated subtitle machine.

Nancy Pelosi shows the No1 way to keep your fingers out of the Cookie Jar is to hold them high and not let them out of your sight.

If Bill O'Reilly thinks Helen Thomas is the Wicked Witch of the East, he hasn't seen anything yet.

"See it takes two hands to count the number of stimulus packages we need to get out of the recession!"

Oh say can you see the dawning of the new day?

With a conductor’s flair, Speaker Pelosi spins a tale of victory for the American people.

Nancy Pelosi swears that this week did not get on her nerves.
Kim
Harrisonburg, va

787 Billion and I still can't get a correct name plate in front of me??

Martin
Mansfield, MA

Nancy Pelosi discusses one of the many earmarks of the stimulus bill: funding for manicure salons.

"This is how shaky things are gonna get without this stimulus".

poof...poof poof...drat, your all still here.

Now settled down. You’ll all get your turn.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi poses for what will eventually become one of the most unique Mardi Gras floats in the Endymion parade!

New Orleans area

When referring to the country's recession , Pelosi makes it clear that 'to resusitate we must levitate."

Wait, you guys forgot to go "all hail the queen"

Nancy Pelosi entertains reporters with her rendition of the Macarena.

Wait!! Whats that I hear? One vote from the republicans on the stimulas bill?

Nicole Scurfield
Louisiana

who's the leader of the band and of the company etc

Picture a tomboy in lace, our Nancy with the un-laughing face .

Having sympathy with the average working and non-working American, the Speaker of the House shows reporters she’s cutting back her mannies to every other week. Peddies will still be monthly.

Scare tactics SOLD HERE !

Wait! My nail polish has to dry before we adojurn!

Five.....five dollar......five dollar foot long!

One part of the bill that will create jobs is the funding for the Liberace museum.

Nancy Pelosi assures reports that her steroid days are over.

Nancy Pelosi peforms a spell over her website address to
ward off evil Republicans.

".... Your Valentine E-Cards can be sent direct to my email address here."

Superlady prepares for Takeoff !

We were very disciplined. We kept it under $800 billion.

Look into my eyes, it's over now.

While presiding over the House of Representatives today, Friday the 13th, Speaker Pelosi strives fpr bipartisanship by attempting to cast a "Spell of Submission" on her Republican counterparts.

Keep your distance guys and keep it down, I can't hear myself speak!

A reporter was stunned when Nancy Pelosi's reply to a question
of how she got to be speaker was: "Look! I can count to 10!"

You want to know what economic crisis? Well, I speak:

Economic crisis isn't to buy: expensive clothes, jewelry, makeup, handbags, shoes, beauty products, beauty treatments, beauty salon, in short, everything that is essential for a woman live together with men (in politics)!

And then as we reached $3 trillion, my hands began to shake violently...

No Kiidding ! Bipartisanship "SOLD HERE" !

Pelosi confused reporters when she stood like this for the entire news conference until they realized that this was her version of a 'web address'

Speaker Pelosi shows how she applied "magic fingers" to the stimulus bill.

Its the wave!....then one two three strikes your out at the old commerce secretary game!

Only the Republicans don't get it!!!!

Pelosi leads Congress in a rendition of "We Are Family".

Nancy Pelosi puts a reverse voodoo curse on house Republicans.

"We're not worthy, we're not worthy"

Nancy Pelosi, anxious to impress the reporters, performs a
special magic trick.

Speaker Pelosi discovers that conducting the Marine Band is more difficult than it looks.

House Speaker Pelosi does her best to keep Republicans at bay even resorting to attempts to hypnotize them.

New Orleans area

I hear the Republicans complaining, but they can't get past Bush didn't win.

Closet wiccan Nancy Pelosi announces the house approval of the stimulus bill, "By the pricking of my thumbs, stimulus wicked this way comes."

Cool it boys, Viagra will still be included in your health plans.

And if my husband forgets me on Valentine's Day I will strangle
him with my bare hands.

I'm only taking question from those who brought me Valentine's day gift.

Nancy Pelosi dispels the rumor that her website has changed to WWE.speaker.gov

Cameron Cox
Winnipeg, Canada

On a day that House Democrats handily passed the revised stimulus package, Speaker Pelosi weighs the risks of reaching a hand out to House Republicans versus giving a hand-out to her Democratic colleagues.

Here is my e-mail address, so no excuses boys I'm accepting Valentine E-Cards this year they are mostly free !!

Red Rover, Red Rover, send Madam Speaker right over!

Nancy Pelosi shows off her freshly manicure nails painted in "Stimulus Salmon".

Its your Dime, but my day to Shine !

Desperate for help, Nancy Pelosi tries to heal the economy with her "laying on of hands."

Now stop what you are doing and go to 'www.speaker.gov' and make your donations to our stimulus plan.

Hush, hush, sweet colleagues...Let me speak!

Nancy Pelosi attempts to pacify irate Republicans by inviting them to an Oscar party.

...and then I parted the "Red" Sea of Republicans to provide passage to the Stimulus Bill

Can i have all your attention with some of my magic hands

'Twas the night before stimulus signing,
and all through the house,
not a creature was stirring,
not even my $30 million mouse.

OK, guys, as soon as we're done here, we're all headed out to see the new movie about my life, Confessions of a Spend-a-holic.

5 Dollar footlong....

.........and to add a bit of excitement, from now on I will conclude every speach with.........JAZZ HANDS!!!

You are feeling sleepy. Your eyes are drooping. You love the new stimulus plan...

Nancy Pelosi sings praises of the stimulated package.

" In a last ditch effort, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelsoi performs reiki on the economy."

help!!!!!!!!! i dropped my glasses i cant see wtihout them

I've heard about looks like a deer in the headlights.....but I've never felt like a deer in the headlights!

And jazz hands!!!!

wait, wait, the nails aren't dry yet!

These aren't the do-nothing Congressional leaders you're looking for. Move along.

" I have important news for all of you but first, let's do the Macarena!"

This is all an illusion. When I snap my fingers, you will all wake up and won't remember anything.

Republicans scare me? Oh I'm shaking in fear! Not!

Speaker Pelosi describing Voodoo Economics to new House members.

With my magic hands i will make the stimulus plan all better for everybody.

By the power given to me the great house speaker, I give you the stimulus plan. Any questions ?

And that's not all...with every contribution of $500 or more to the website address below, I'll send you a free Snuggie to keep you warm when they turn off your heat.

wait a mintue, the nails are not dry yet!

Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain............

"The FROST Will detract from the 'FLAMING LIB' complaints!...oooh"

On matters of policy, I always have a letter in the sleeve!

But have days that have days that you leave the batter better!!
For example, in the weekly news conference on Capitol Hill!!

"Whoooosh! You're ALL fairies!"

Wait–that's not bwhat I said–I said we're all thrilled that the stimulus bill will be passed!

Whoa! I am still reeling from that Joaquin Phoenix interview!

I learned in my youth that If you can sell Girl Scout Cookies, you can sell anything , and I'm here today to prove it .

Nancy is putting a spell on the bank CEO's: When I snap my
fingers, you will no longer be greedy pigs. You will sell your
private jets and no more bonuses.

Long ? I would like to think that some Republicans are "Evelyn Woods" Graduates !

"You will obey when you hear the command 'PE-LO-SEE'!!!"

I SEE unemployed people!

Keep sited we have pass an other stimulus.

Narinder/Freso/CA

That bow on Aretha's hat was this wide, I still can't get over it!

I have seen the light at the end of economy – heal...I said heal...

five.......five dollar.......five dollar foot long

Wait a minute, we are in charge now. We do what we want now people!

GENTLEMEN,

Mr. ethanol already was!
Where there's a will, there's a way.
Good things come to those who wait!

Listen everyone! Listen! It's 1234567890 Unix Time!

New Orleans area

And so when I wave my hands over the budget like this it automatically balances. Pretty neat how our new administration can take care of all these issues!

YES WE CAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Yes Valentine E-Cards are fine thats why I have my e-mail contact address with me here."

No, no, I get it done with marionette strings!

I thought having all the flags in the background would look good when I tell you how deep in debt we are, but it is all for a really good cause – to keep Democrats in power!

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi skillfully conducts the choir of reporters through yet another refrain of "Hail to the Obama Administration."

So if I wave my hands this way, the stimulus bill favors tax breaks, and if I wave them to and fro, the stimulus bill favors "investments". We got stimulus either way!

HOLD YOUR APPLAUSE's PEOPLE the real star President barack obama is not here

Thanks for the standing ovation. Now you can all sit down, be quiet and let me fill you in on all the crap going on behind closed doors with Rush's fans.

Vote yeah, Voldemort! I command you!

House Speaker Pelosi is hypnotized by the sound of her own voice.

Luke, come to the dark side. I am your mother.

as Evita said “In government, one actress is enough.”

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi 'gets low' and shows off her shorty dance moves, while hoping to get recruited by Dancing with the Stars.

By openly displaying her hang nails, Speaker Pelosi demnstrates to the press that she did, reluctantly, delete the manicure subsidy from the stimulus package

Stop right there, there's a endangered RAT in the house!

We have been in office only one month and we have already set the new record for deficit, umm... stimulus spending by an adminsitration. The good news is WE are doing it collaboratively with strong bipartisan support. Just wait till Al Franken gets here and we can do comedy routines with it too.

Over here!!! Throw the ball Barack...I'm open!

Hey Barack didya say put them up or put them down? Anything you say, Mr. President.

"Each of my fingers represents $10,000..... And this is what every man woman and child now owes to the National Debt!"

Yes yes, 7 voted against it, but I can only control so many puppets at once!

Settle down America, don't worry, we won't be in charge four years from now!

I was the first woman to occupy the post of Speaker of the House.

No pain, no gain!

Please, slow down on the e-mail. I don't know why but, I'm getting alot these day's.

When asked how many members read the stimulus plan they are voting for....

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi skillfully conducts the choir of reporters through yet another refrain of the weekly news conference economic blues.

Republicans before you bash a Stimulas package, read it!!

I'll get you my pretty...and your little dog too!

Cohutta, GA

Color me Blue, cause were in the Red !

Drafting the revised "Stimulas Package" has given madam Speaker the worst writers cramp!

Bueller? Bueller?It is what d-o-o economics? Anybody? Anybody? Voodoo economics.

Cohutta, GA

"Lord Vader, arise!"

Speaker Pelosi as she orchestrates the bailout.

Don’t rush; you’re all welcome to Stimulus Theme Park, “Four Flags over Pelosi.”

See, there are more than just a bunch of WHITE flags in the stimulus package.

B7!!!! BINGO!!!!

All together now!
Let's vote for the stimulus package!

The stimulus package is THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS big!

Speaker Pelosi attempts to her best Joaquin Phoenix rapping impression. She is missing the beard and shades.

Cohutta, GA

I am the puppet master and you all are my puppets!!!!!!!

Carrollton, GA

Wait just one minute, if you don't mind, my nails are drying.

These are not spirit fingers... THESE are spirit fingers!

Union, New Jersey

Nancy Pelosi attempts to reassure the public,
"you're getting sleepy, very sleepy..."

Wait a minute people, don't all vote at once.

You will vote for the bill, you will vote for the bill, you will vote for the bill.

See...No strings attached to this "Stimulus Bill"

I will soon levitate out of range of any challenging questions.

In response to the stimulas package, Pelosi impersonates Pres. Nixon...
"we are not crooks"

Please please calm down I know you all want to be my Valentine but could some one make a higher bid than two bucks.

Former Vice-president Dick Cheney celebrates halloween 8 months early in his Nancy Pelosi costume.

And with a wave of my hands the economic stimulus package will pass! Hey the trick did not work! Come on Republicans I need your help on this. Ok now all together... with a wave of OUR hands the economic stimulus package will pass! Still not helping? Well, whatever us Democrats will pass it on our own.

Cohutta, GA

America.........you are healed

Nancy Pelosi trying to hypnotize America: "You are sleepy, very sleepy. When you awake you will believe I am the greatest leader in the world. You will support everything I do. When you awake you will remember nothing"

Everyone chill. We got this. No need to be worried. We aren't in a recession or anything.

Cohutta, GA

Maybe if I used jazz hands while I am speaking Republicans would become excited about supporting the Stimulus Package?

Cohutta, GA

To prove that I am Bipartisan, I think that most Republicans are a bunch of Nancys!

Speaker Pelosi uses sign language to calm irrate Republicans down.

I am but a puppet for the people

More details in the package will be revealed to the person who volunteers to be my valentine!

Sharath
SJC, CA

Let me tell you everyone, after a long, long debate we have agreed on a Stimulus Bill this big; can you believe it?

Speaker Pelosi quickly realizes the gravity of the situation and desperately works to calm the angry masses by asking them not to remove their shoes.

Speaker Pelosi practices newest mediation technique at today's press conference.

THE POWER OF PELOSI COMPELS YOU!
THE POWER OF PELOSI COMPELS YOU!

Does this sign make my butt look big?

Nancy Pelosi's Stimulas Package Press Junket turns into song ...
"Dont stop, thinking about tomorrow,
Dont stop, it'll soon be here,
It'll be, better than before,
Yesterdays gone, yesterdays gone."

I'm crazy this many times! Seriously I am.

Nancy is using her podium like a Ouija Board, Chanting "Oh great spirit lift the GOP up to place a YEA vote"....

Greetings! We demorcrates come with prosperity for all

"I'm not a crook!", said in her best Nixon voice.

Nancy uses the Ellen D way of quietening down the audience... "A CAWCAWCAW" sit down please

"I put a spell on you! And now your MINE!"

"People, people PLEASE! Joaquin has assured me that he will answer ALL of your questions!"

"... and now I shall take this plan to the internet via a series of tubes..."

"Herbal potion, cauldron brew,
now be charged with magick true.
With intent I speak this charm,
all be blessed and none be harmed.
Ever minding the law of three,
This is my will, so vote it be."

Oh, no! You don't need to read any of that!

The President? He said, that, Democrat's aren't little puppet's on string's!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No, "Nancy Pelosi" is NOT an anagram of "Lord Voldemort"

Rodney, Los Angeles

Capitol Hill Charades
"Ok. Ten Words"
"We the Republican Party will vote for the Stimulus Bill"

All Hail to the chief

“People, people PLEASE! Mr. Phelps has assured me that there is more than enough to go around!”

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi fits in her imitation of Paula Abdul during her weekly news conference.

Double, double, toil and trouble
Deficits will follow bubble!

That's right folks....10 zeros!!

"Just Nancy!" "Just Nancy!"
(Must be said like Jack McFarland from "Will & Grace)

Cohutta, GA

Woe! Who threw that shoe?

...And "Jazz Hands!"

Chillax people. we are in control now.

We want to vote on the Stimulus Package now so that we don't have to postpone the Congressional recess.

Feel the power.... Now repeat after me, Obama will lead us to the light of this long.... longgg..... LOOONNNGGGG dark tunnel!

"This is what I have to say to the Senate, 'Ooooh, I'm so scared.'"

Calm down, Calm down, I swear these lips are for real !!!

I am now going to use the Jedi mind trick! YOU ALL WILL SUPPORT THE STIMULUS BILL !

Please be seated and you will be bailed out in the order you came in.....

Now Now everyone, just calm down and don't panic. It's not our money anyways... we borrowed it.

Peter
Vancouver BC Canada

Do you beleive in the laying on of hand's..... well I am gonna lay these hands all over you!

Please everyone have a seat. Honest this is really me its not a mask.

Anyone for a little magic? Watch, I can make a trillion dollars disappear. Nothing up my sleeves...presto!

see everyone ... if i can count to ten !

Speaker Pelosi tries to get reporters excited about the Stimulus Bill by starting a Mexican wave.

Of course I know how big the stimulus is. See, I counted how big it is on my own 10 fingers.

See! No hands.... that is how easy this stimulus package is SUPPOSE to be!!!!!!

Calm down people Sarah Palin will do fine as commerce secretary she has great relationships with Russia.

Speaker Nancy Pelosi hypnotizes all present at Capitol Hill so she can make a quick get away before economy completely crumbles.

Pull my fingers.

Now you see the stimulus plan..... NOW YOU DON'T!!!!!!!!!!

"If ya'll would semmer down, your tax cuts have been approved!"
Jeramy Hegney, Spanaway, WA

Calm down everyone. I haven't really done anything yet.

Talk amongst yourself...

After a stunning spell rendering the house illiterate and ignorant, the witch tries a curse on the public.

Nancy Pelosi attempts to levitate the stimulus bill.

All good things come to those who wait..... so set down & shut up!!!

Due to the digital transition we are experiencing technical difficulties, please direct any questions to the website at the bottom of your screen.

What if the hokey pokey IS what it's all about?

Do these flags make me look fat?

sshhhh everyone...., I'm the speaker here,..

Wait! Don't tell me. I know the answer to this one.

Amy Summers
Punta Gorda, FL

Tonight's pic: Shame on those Republicans...they may have thought they had 9 lives, but I have 10!"

bow down to your almighty speaker

"Settle down folks. Obama will be here in a moment."

Watch me while I pull a few elephants out of thin air...

"These are not the droids you are looking for."

Barack Obama made this look so easy a few months back!

"OUT, you demon of democracy, OUT!"

With a few waves of her hands, Speaker Pelosi magically raises the national debt...

You are now in a deep sleep, you will as I say, when you awake you will not remember this......Vote for the stimulus package..

Nancy with her head in the stars once again.

Please, Please, everyone. Yes I'm brilliant, but remember , Obama made me this way.

Everybody Dance Now!!!!!!

...from my cold, dead hands...

Nixon's long lost sister Nancy speaks, "I did not steal your stimulus checks."

American Idol is now holding auditions for the U.S. Senate Season

Dont worry! The octuplets mother will be the biggest beneficiary of the stimulus package.

Stimulate, Stimulate, read my lips.....Stimulate !

Speaker Pelosi brings back voodoo economics,