I love reading your posts!
If we didn’t laugh in the midst of this mess- we would have to cry, and that is just no fun.
28 years old, you are a bit younger than I imagined!
I think my Retirement account is good for a Big Mac and 1 happy meal, no cheese! Considering I am a few years older than you and using Canadian funds, the future is not looking as great as it could be.

Cheers to you Jack!
Great Blogging!

Candace

If congress thinks there is equity in toxic paper I cannot understand why they refuse to purchase my Trans World Airlines stock.

Perhaps one day it too will be worth something more than a paper napkin used for that Big Mac, but can also be sold on ebay.

We are headed for economic meltdown and government failure like never saw before in American history.

We all know if it came down to it Tom would get knocked out as well as Mcclame by Obama, fortunately Obama will win by stating the facts.

ARIZONA RON FROM TUCSON

Wow Jack,
you always know how to cheer me up, your posts are the best!
Where can I sign up for that eBay auction? Sound cool, lol.
Oh yeah, isn’t that you on that picture with your arm in a sling? You don’t need Leibovitz, believe me ;p.

Keep them posts comming Jack!

Kristien

Gee, you should post your picture for from your description it sounds like it would make the list of top Halloween costumes this year!

Thank God — Jack is in the house.

See, now THAT’s the way to get consumers to spend. Throw a few hot items on eBay. Hey Jack, tell Anderson recycling his post-its on eBay is all in the line of corporate social responsibility. It’s green and supports the economy. Two for two!

If Annie Leibovitz takes your picture, no crying afterwards about how you never thought you would look like you were just wearing a towel from that photo shoot where you were just wearing a towel.

I think if John McCain can attack Mr. Obama instead of telling the American people what he can do to straighten out this whole financial mess. Then he doesn’t have any business as our President. The only thing he will change is his underwear! A 72 year old tiger isn’t going to change his stripes not matter what he proclaims.

Whoops. My clicker hand got away from me and submitted my last comment mid sentence. Any comment I really wanted posted would normally die a sad death in moderation, which is what I was hoping would happen. But nooo. This one got slapped up there faster than my page could reload. Of course. Anyhoo, my real comment:

Well, great. Now that’s stuck in my head. I wish it were Sunday…(whoa oh oh)

If things get any worse I’m going to have to log onto eBay and start auctioning office supplies that may-or-may-not have been used by Anderson Cooper.

This, my friend, could no doubt make you a pretty penny. A little exploitive? Eh, what he doesn’t know can’t hurt him, right? “Anderson, can you hold this for a sec? What? No reason.”

One other thing, I noticed that some of you have left comments asking to see pictures of me. As flattering — and by flattering I mean scary — as that is, you’ll have to wait as Anderson has yet to come through on his promise to have Annie Leibovitz take my portrait.

So I have helped flatter and scare you at the same time? I believe my work here is done. C’mon! No fancypants photographer needed. Though you can hire Liebovitz yourself if you sell enough of the office equipment that Anderson touched. Problem solved!

All of a sudden the financial crisis is a $800 trillion joke. I’m not amused.

If things get any worse I’m going to have to log onto eBay and start auctioning office supplies that may-or-may-not have been used by Anderson Cooper.

Don’t bother to list those supplies that were used by Anderson. I’ll buy them.

Here’s hoping they get totally out-of-control and Tom Brokaw has to open up a can of whoop-ass.

That would be way too cool.

I have not opened my 401 K or my children’s college fund statements in several months and nothing I hear makes me want to log in now. Do you think Uncle Sam will pass a law letting us all take the losses on our investments as tax deductions this year? I certainly understand why they are allowing tax deductions for imports of rum? God, knows we all need a drink! As to your picture…. in 20 years, any picture taken of you when you were 28 looks great!

My best to you, Jack. If you’re really strapped for cash, try stand-up comedy; you’re brilliant!

Jack, maybe Erica can just interview you and Joey, the winner of beat 360, one day.

Did you see Mike Huckabee and his band last night on TV? No Bruce Springsteen but fun to see some cameramen and writers at Fox having fun!

Those must be some eyebrows!

At least your 401K will get you a Big Mac - mine at this point will only buy the paper they wrap the Big Mac in. All those years saving and then its gone in the blink of an eye. As one of my co-workers says - “I can retire tomorrow; the question is how long can I afford to live afterwards.”.

Tom Brokaw with a can of whoop-ass. One can only hope. Its too bad that no debates have been scheduled with Jon Stewart as the moderator. Now that would be a debate!

Thanks for a great post as usual.

Annie Kate
Birmingham AL

Very funny. I’m finding that anticipating pres/vice-pres debates are a lot more fun than actually watching them. Keep writing Jack. We may have to sign you up for a gig in the white house, just to keep them laughing. Gonna need a can of whoop ass for this round, I betcha.

“If things get any worse I’m going to have to log onto eBay and start auctioning office supplies that may-or-may-not have been used by Anderson Cooper.”

I could really use a Coffee Mug.
Or perhaps a gently used desk chair, you know, for my sciatica.

Jack Grey’s posts offer an Oasis in the swill of Political Punch and Cookies.
Gracias Senor Grey.

Hey, wouldn’t Anderson have to take a cut off the profits since he may or may not have touched these items? You might want to check out his contract. You know, if he had a good agent, all angles should have been covered including office supplies. If you’re selling his stuff, though, dibbies on the African art.

Maybe the Chihuahuas from Beverly Hills could moderate a debate between Cindy and Michelle. Now that would be a show. And probably more informative than what we’ll see tomorrow night.

If things get any worse I’m going to have to log onto eBay and start auctioning office supplies that may-or-may-not have been used by Anderson Cooper.

Jack,
Why not…. you can buy do you want to buy everything on E-bay…. not matter to buy Anderson Cooper’ items……. no problem, solve problem.

At the rate that the markets are going down, and the value of the dollar. we can put the USA on e-bay and hope we make a profit?
And hope the country that buys us won’t tax our profits.

I noticed that some of you have left comments asking to see pictures of me. As flattering — and by flattering I mean scary — as that is, you’ll have to wait as Anderson has yet to come through on his promise to have Annie Leibovitz take my portrait.

I guess we’ll have to put the cult thing on hold then. Glad I didn’t order any letterhead.

You are actually the love child of Abe Vigoda and Tyne Daly.

I used to watch Cagny & Lacy. Not a bad show.

I admit I would have to google the ‘Abe Vigoda’ although it sounds familiar..

Ah, Jack, beauty comes from within! I took a few days off from politics for a big ten football week-end. I’m not sure I really want to come back to reality. I left pretty disgusted with Congress for adding so much pork to a bill that no one really wanted but we had to have. I think we should vote them all out of office. I have yet to check my 401k, but we only have one college payment left and our mortgage is still ok. It could be much worse!

Dear Jack Gray,

I loved your piece here. I laughed so hard and I thank you for that. I know all of this is not funny, but I couldn’t help laughing at your sense of humor…I especially liked the “open up a can of whoop-ass,” and the “middle names” you gave to each of the candidates.” Oh, and hopefully Anderson Cooper can loan us all a few pens soon? We’ll all probably be needing them. Hopefully, we can afford to have them shipped to us?

Jack,
Keep me laughing young man. Have you though about moonlighting with Jon Stewart? How about Steven Colbert? You have the right kind of wit. If we can’t laugh at ourselves we will all be taking numbers to jump off the nearest bridge. I have no stocks, no bonds, no insurance, no retirement funds, no children, no animals, no house in foreclosure and no agenda. I’m following the direction that is on our nation’s currency - “IN GOD WE TRUST.”

Jack, you’re only 28? I’m so jealous!

Jack, you made my day. Love reading your blog and the blogs from others who send their comments.

I’m a couple years older than Jack. I’m an old fool with no job and no hope.

But for some reason tonight I’m giddy. Is this a bad sign? I was sad & crying last week and now tonight I’m giddy. I think Jack has just jinxed me with his “manic” Monday blog.

Very funny, Jack! You make people laugh across the pond as well! ^^

Buy American. Go see a Hollywood film. The stock market goes up and down. At least you have a 401k. You know how many people don’t? Why wait for Leibovitz when the poles are melting? Actually she should start a series of Band W stills of the other species on the planet soon maybe.

Well summarized, Mr. Jack! :~)

As for the upcoming debate, which I will definitely watch this evening, I suspect that McCain (I mean, “McSame”) will throw blows as low as he can go since he is truly desperate at this point. I just hope that Obama can maintain his seemingly concrete, professional demeanor while at the same time he defeats the garbage we all know that McSame plans to dish out every chance he gets.

Kendra
Albuquerque, NM
Independent Voter for Obama