How do you work this doohicky?

"President Bush has been driving without this for the past eight years Cindy."

This is great. The Straight Talk Express needed an extra wheel.

Just what we need to steer John's campaign in the right direction.

This is called a steering wheel. It's what your driver uses to get you to and from your jet...

Oh, for me? thank you!
WHAT IS IT?

And if your husband has trouble breathing, press this button here.

"And this is the Emergency Eject From Presidential Politics Button."

Which button take on the fast track to the white house?

Cindy shopping for accessories for John’s motorized wheelchair

So...they found THIS on the moon?

And if your husband has fallen and he can't get up, press this button and an ambulance will be on it's way shortly.

Where's the button to shoot missiles at terrorists?

OK Cindy this is all you get, gas is too expensive you have to pull a Fred Flintstone and use some foot power.

And what's this little do-hicky?

WOW! Look at all the shiny buttons!

This little baby will have the "Straight Talk Express" running circles around Obama's "Yes we Can".

Cindy McCain is one of the most valuable parts of the McCain Campaign.

"Wow, John never lets me drive!"

Cindy McCain stands there wondering why she can't see her reflection.

...and this button will allow you to eject those pesky reporters from the new and improved "Straight Talk Express" bus.

Jefferson, Louisiana

Park, reverse, neutral, drive and low, so THAT's what PRNDL means!

Yes Maam, jsut press this button and you will be at Target in no time..

Cindy McCain looks for new and innovative ways to create "political spin" for her husband's campaign.

Plug it in, wind him up, and he's good to go for another town hall meeting.

Jefferson, Louisiana

So remember, if the Senator nods off, this one sends a shock to wake him up, this one forces a laugh and a hand wave, and this one says 'That's not change we can believe in!'

Sorry Cindy, but this wheel only spins cars, not politics!

I know this may be a presumptive blonde question, but ..."Shouldn't this be attached to the car?"

Mrs. McCain decides to forgo straight talk and get straight to the express.

when john is elected president can I have the rest of the car?

Mrs.McCain this is how to steer your husband John 's campaign in the right direction!

Do indy cars have vanity mirrors? I need to check my makeup.

O.K. now that you have the right turns down, let's practice the more uncomfortable left ones.

When you hit the green button funds are automatically transferred to Swiss bank accounts and then to your husband's campaign...

Huh,so this is a wheel.......neat!

"And this button will eject any whiner sitting in the passenger seat."

Oh, I see... Yes, John, is much better with these things. He just has a hard time finding the on/off switch for the internet....

Yes mamaam, this button operates the ejection seat. I guarentee it will send Senator Gramm into orbit until after the election.

Wow! I bet I could put on my heavy makeup a lot faster with that than the brush I'm currently using.

Every time your husband looks like he's getting tired, you just stick this on his back, turn it a few times, and watch him go.

Down south in Tennessee, politics is creeping into sports. Al Gore sneaks in and disengages the steering wheels of the Indy cars, suggesting that three-legged races would make the state greener, as Cindy tries to keep it red.

Let's all sing...."You picked a fine time to leave me loose wheel"

SO THIS IS WHAT THEY DRIVE THE CAR WITH

WHERE IS THE REST OF THE CAR

"Cindy, don't worry, there is no doubt you will do a much better job than John did as a Navy pilot".

you press this button and it ejects, you press this button and it fires rockets, but it could ruin the paint job!

Marcy,
Mobile, AL

Do you think my husband will have more energy if I stick this on his back and wind it?

You mean if I spin this thing, the car will turn?

Cindy~ "is this one of those things i saw on TV flying around TX?"

Indy Race officail gives Cindy McCain a complementry steering wheel with A Honk if you vote for John McCain horn on it!

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Watch it Lady! You're no Danica Patrick"

"Can I see your permission slip from your husband?"

Cindy~ "Ah-ha...so this is what you steer a car with!"

i get it, the roundy thing is for steering. can you show where i plug in my hair drier.

"It's much smaller than you made it sound on your myspace"

I sold the car for gas money ...now where can I hide this?

First you mash this button, then you say, "Play Artist Abba".

Where is the plastic key and flashing lights?

This thing-a-ma-jig fell out of my car and I don't know where to reattach it.

Mrs. McCain purposes adding a make-up mirror and a lip gloss holder to the steering wheel: citing she often applies make-up while driving 120mph.

Cindy, you can use this steering wheel to swerve the Straight Talk Express from the left to the right and back again over the next few months.

When this thingy spins, the chads are slung off.

Olen Ely
Lexington, KY

Just in case, mash this button to turn off all the microphones.

Once you steer him in the right direction you can use the mute button as necessary.
Winnipeg, Canada

okay, so i push this button and what was the part about the driver thinking he's actually in control?

Atlanta, GA

I am quite sure my driver would love this ........

John will be thrilled to know that this car is Murphy-proof.
It doesn't even have a left blinker!

My husband would love this for his mobility scooter.

Cindy McCain approves a new bigger,more powerful steering wheel
built especially for the Straight Talk Express -This will get John's mojo running!

My husband would just love this on his mobility scooter.

" Now , by turning far left you get a picture on the screen here, of Barack, and then just turn toward the right , but careful , not too far...and then we see John . If you turn too far , Pat Robertson shows up. "

I know this is very technical, so stop me if you get confused. This is a steering wheel, it's used by the drivers to control the car. Going too fast?

hang on tight to this, you'll gain total control over the straight talk express.

Okay...Let me pretend I know what I am doing

Indy car officail tells Cindy McCain one wrong turn and John's campaign will end up in the pits!

Woman "What am I doing? I'm way to old for this!"

Wow! This makes the wheels turn? My driver never told me that!

Let me just pretend I am listening so I can admire this race official. He's soooo much cuter than my really old husband.

If you manage to push all the right buttons,
you and your husband will cruise to victory.

Will you help me find where I parked the rest of the car?

John said to put air in all the wheels...but this one's got me stumped.

Cindy, let me show you something that John
may not be able to comprehend.
This thingy here is called a "wheel".

This is a steering wheel. You turn it like this.

The McCain Campaign responds to Obama being a Nascar fan.

So I just run around, with this steering wheel, and go "Varooom, Varooom. Beep, Beep"

SO , THIS IS A STEERING WHEEL, MY CHAUFFER HAS ONE OF THESE ...

I BET MICHELLE DOESNT KNOW THIS ..

You just push this "On Star" button, and someone will help you with directions.

Which button controls the "CD Player?"

Hey, mister ! What's wrong with this thing ?
The "OnStar" operator just told me to quit whining !

"Oh yes, I've seen people use these mysterious things when they drive me to do some Private Jetting on the weekends. It feels quite inpowering, I'll shall take this wheel of steering and apply it to my husband so that he can hit that round thing in the middle there and prewarn the press when he hits all those campaign pot-holes."

-New Jersey

This button will go "Back to the future" and turn John to 50 years old.

Cindy McCain is exploring new ways to help John win the Presidential race.

The car always bears to the left Mrs. McCain...You know.. like the Democratic Party.

Why just the steering wheel? You don't "Trust" me with the rest of the car!

The wheels start falling off the McCain "Straight Talk Express".

I still don't understand, see my husband is usually the one in the driver's seat. At least that is what he wants me to tell people.

Sheri V
Albuquerque, NM

Just show me how to run Barrack over and make it look like an accident.

Wait...I sold my company for what!?

And if you turn it this way, you might be able to steer McCain's campaign in the right direction.

This button mutes all the whiners, and this button mutes all the surrogates.

Check it out. When you push the horn button
it plays the theme song from "Underdog" !

"Oh, this is so exciting. They don't usually let me drive!"

You must have a really tiny air bag, that deploy's from your steering wheel.

Let's all sing....."you picked a fine time to leave me loose wheel"

(sung to the tune of Kenny Roger's "Lucille")

"Cindy, when you turn this the car turns with it", "Really, that's AMAZING!"

Once we install this on the backseat of the Straight Talk Express, you'll call the shots, but he will still think he is in control.

I'm no good with these things, but my chauffeur might be interested.

I have always wondered what it was like to drive

"You think John can use this to control missles?"

Hope your race goes as good as my husband, I'm going to be FIRST LADY.

I have no idea what this guy is talking about but oddly he makes more sense to me than my husband.

This is the main componet. If you can't win the race with this, it will at least cure an ED problem.

So how do you hold this to steer toward the middle?

"Hey Cindy ...tell John this came out of Obama's vehicle...it only steers right now."

"Don't you have to somehow attach this to the car to make it work?"

Kathy, Canada

Yes, this wheel will turn RIGHT, and keep you on course to the White House.

"So with this I can control John? Is there a mute button?"

Cindy says, Wow, I only know how to work the wheel on the planes, what's this for?

Cindy McCain and IndyCar work on a new steering wheel to help america get back on track.

Wow, this is way cooler than the Model T John drives.

Yes Ma'am ,it comes with power steering .

It takes 4D batteries , not included .

Sorry Ma'am , it only comes in black .

OK, which button fires the Democrat-seeking missiles?

It comes with an attachment that the Senator can hook-up to the Potty when the time comes .

This steering wheel has been modified to interface with the Senator's Atari .And will hook-up directly too DMV for his next drive test .

I have always wanted to drive an invisible car.

Can my husband use this to drive on the RIGHT side and the LEFT side at the SAME time?

Mark S.
Sacramento,CA

"After following your husband's campain, I figured this may help 'pick up the pace'."

Caught on camera, Cindy McCain plans her escape by taking lessons on "How to use a steering wheel."

OK Mrs. McCain...Act like you're interested..

The kids have one just like this for the Wii, but of course you know that Anderson.

Kathy, Canada

Call me a dumb blonde, but how does this steer the car when it isn;t even attached to it?

"It can turn to the left, to the right or you and your husband can even leave it in a neutral position"

Oh, this isn't a miniature roulette wheel?

You're wrong...this is not the greatest invention ever...that would be beer! Oh, I grant you that this wheel was a fine invention, but it does not go nearly as well with pizza.

Cindy...Ga.

I’m at the Indy 200 to show that the McCains are in-touch with real Americans, on issues like race.

Here...tell John he doesn't have to reinvent the wheel just realign it a little!

Cindy...Ga.

"..just make sure he holds the wheel steady, and presses on this little 'Cruise Control' button here to 'stay the course' in 2009".

Peter T
Mankato, MN

What do you mean I can only go "Left"?

So what your saying is that we can attach this to Johns back and he can sway from the left to the right and the voters will not mind!

People come to Washington believing it's the center of power. I know I did. It was only later that I learned that Washington is a steering wheel that's not connected to the engine.

Cindy...Ga.

I was going to take the train, but my husband doesn't support a woman's right to choo-choo's.

“So you say this is Belgian made. . . I have heard good things about them. . . “

cindy McCain sells the final piece of the straight talk express

So does the car come with one of these?

What exactly is this used for? I usually just sit in the back seat and let someone else drive me around.

So you're saying we should just keep it centered?

"This looks just like the thing I use to open the safe at home!"

Tell John it's time to drive it in hard or he'll be going home!

Cindy...Ga.

Tell your husband this is what the kids are calling a "steering wheel."

"Thanks, but we already have a fifth wheel-Hillary."

Does this come in platinum?

Cindy, turn left and the White House will be to your right.

"Here's left, this is right and there's middle of the road."

"We call it "The Coop" for short–it also comes in gunmetal grey and helps you do a perfect 360."

This is what's left of the car President Bush used to steer the whole country wrong.

We'll let the Democrats think they have control, then BOOM! See it comes right off.

these cars can go over 200 mph huh. we should start selling it to Iran.

Are you saying this controls a car? I thought my driver did that.

This is all that's left after President Bush steered the whole country wrong.

Usually Dick Cheney drives.

"Cindy, believe it or not ....Jesse Jackson even thought his car was now talking down to him so he cut it off !

We keep this on the top shelf so President Bush can't get to it.

So this is what that thing Jeeves uses in front of the Maybach looks like.

he may be a winner on the race track but in the presidential race let's face it. he's miles behind

And you are sure there is nothing symbolic in this not being attached to anything?

"Only $750,000??? I'll take it!!! You guys do take American Express, right?"

"With all these sky rocketing gas prices, the steering wheel might bell these drives can afford."

How often do you get Kevin Costner and Dolly Parton in the same photograph

This is from the car the Obama Campaign will sponsor?
Yes, that screw will come loose after about 10 laps.

If there is no horn, how am I supposed to tell the Democrats to get out of the way?

Can it steer an election?

John Casnig
Kingston, Ontario

With all these sky rocketing gas prices, the steering wheel might be all these drives can afford.

Yes ma'am, I suppose if you turned it upside down and stuck it on your head that it would look something like a crown.

Does it come with an optional car?

John Casnig
Kingston, Ontario

Well, no, you can't just carry it around and put it on any car that you want. Yes, I realize who you are, but it just doesn't work that way!

Shouldnt this be tilting a little more to the RIGHT?

This wheel is damaged,you can take a look

Well, if you really insist, I suppose I could find one that matches your name tag.

An Indy official tries to help the McCain campaign by explaining to Cindy why her husband should steer a little more toward the center, if he wants to be elected President.

Bud Curtis
Miami, OK

Does this come with a free make-up bag?

The On Star button will give you the proper directions to stay on track & in the race for the White House.

I know it feels strange Cindy, but sometimes you do have to turn to the left.

" The new adventures of Driving Miss Crazy."

when in doubt follow the yelow brick road

"And here's another device Mrs. McCain that can help steer your husband's presidential campaign and drive it to victory".

"Ok I've got it! this thingamagig fits into the whatchamacallit and you drive it to wherever, right?

I have one of these too but mine's inside my car and it has more buttons.

Yes, the parts inside are designed in Japan, made in China, and the whole unit is assembled in Mexico.

Uhh, Hey Cindy, You'll need the rest of the car in order for the stirring wheel to work.

Where do I sit. Seems a little small don't you think.

" Oh how cute! I love circles! They're so fung shui!"

I think this would look better encrusted in Diamonds and ruby's; or maybe just gas cards... There just as expensive...

Golly! NASCAR is taking that "going green" business to extremes!

" Yes sir I unerstand it has horsepower but what about elephant power?"

Indy race official~ "and here is how you use the controls for your Wii.."

Cindy~ "umm...explain again exactly what a Why-ee is?"

"Does it come in red?"

"Turn this to the left to steer away from Phil Gramm, and to the right to avoid Carly Fiorina..."

Do you by any chance know what happened to the rest of my limo?

If you turn this wheel a little more to the left.............

Don't ever push this- the "flip flop control."

That's right I said TAX FREE!

Cindy McCain needs a lesson on how to make her new "See and Say" speak... "And the cow says... Moooo"

Cindy McCain learns the difference between right and left while pretending to drive.

Cindy~ "i don't think this is the type of "Spin" we were was supposed to learn today!"

Now what is it again that I'm supposed to do with those nice young men who keep offering to ride with me?

Cindy: This is the actual first round solid rubber tire produced which coincided with John's birthdate.

This is what is left after the damage done by Senator Graham

"What does HdW mean? No, Cindy, you are looking at it upside down!"

Can I ask an intern to do this for me? Just like my "family" recipes.

Look, I told you lady....there's no such thing as muffler bearings and there's none in the wheels either!!

This is the steering wheel. With just a slight flick of the wrist, your husband can be moved right or centered.

"Ok, now when you're out on the track, be careful of Barack in the blue car – he's been drifting to the right lately."

Does it come in a "Pearl Handle?

Is there a warp drive button like on Star Trek?

No ma'am, I don't think they sell these on Q.V.C.

Cindy was in awe as a mechanic showed her how he had broken her steering wheel.

This will turn John on.

Burt, Bradenton, FL

And . . . the RACE OFFICIAL Points Out to Cindy McCain, and the Number One Cause of Accidents Driving Across Country on the Campaign Race is the "Nut Behind the Wheel", WHOOPS, . . .UNLESS Jesse Jackson is in the Car, WATCH OUT !!

Cindy: "Is that the bluetooth button?"

There was one almost like this on e-bay last week only smaller. Does this one have moon landing capability too?

Cindy: Whoa! Wheel is too heavy for me! I want be driver in the race with other drivers! can't wait to win for me and my husband John!
Megan D.
Shoreline, Wa

Now that Budwiser is being bought out from another country, I will soon be laid off, and all I have to show for it is this steering wheel.
You and John will have to by the car with all your stock gains from the sale.

Oh sweetie this is just precious. What is it?

Don't tell me I'm going to have to wear this around my neck, too.
(Billy in Brooklyn)

Oh, this is how it works!

I know Viagra is covered under our insurance. Is this?

Do you have one in red? Black is not really my color.

Be careful with this thing; its just like your husband; fragile and easily broken.

"Ok, I'll go slower so you can understand, Cindy... this is called a steering wheel..."

"Wow!", says Cindy McCain as she looks on in amasement. "Thank you for showing me the steering wheel... now show me what you do with it?"

Back when John was born this was still called "the reigns."
(Billy in Brooklyn)

So where's the cruise control???

In order to win, you have to put the pedal to the floor and keep turning to the left.

"Let Go!"
"No! I saw it first!"
"It's mine!"
"No it's mine! Oh see – now you broke it."

Can I get this in red?

What do you mean none of you can go turn to the right?

With the cost of fuel, when John is elected, will he be able to find "Funding" for us?

Oh, you turn this thing. Now I get it.

Gosh.. I wish I can set the wheel of fortune like this.

“Do you drink beer with this?" asks Cindy.

If gas prices rises like that Cindy, wheels are what we'll get.

So Mam, we'll stick Vote for McCain stickers right there. Honk or Hit, its up to the people.

"We took this out of Obama's plane last week."

So Americans can just stick this on a bicycle and stop whining about fuel cost?

Hold on tight to these Mam, it might be a bumpy road ahead.

So you are telling me that since we have stopped all Illegal immigrants from working in the USA, This is the only part of the car that Americans actually know how to make?

I have the right to remain silent- Anything I say may be used against me NOT nessicarilly in a Court of Law

So this is firestone? I thought I was going to get a massage.

"Careful there, this thing is older than your husband."

"Look, lady, I'm not the Wizard of Oz over here. You're Republicans, right? Well, you have no brain, you have no heart, you have no soul, and you have no conscience. So the only thing I can help you with is a little steering wheel if you're interested!"

Cindy McCain exames the new Smart racing car.

If you look right here, it's got GPS, so you can stop John from making a dangerous turn into another Viagra conversation.

Forget showing me the wheel, I want to drive the car! I need a little excitement in my life and I am not getting it from john anymore.

Wow! So that's how a steering wheel looks like!?!? I have a chauffeur...

I'm going to help John out and steer this campaign a little to the "right"

"I think I understand all this, but shouldn't there be a car attached somewhere"

"I appreciate you explaining all this, but you don't really think I'm going to drive"

So 11 o'clock and 2 o'clock... easy enough to remember, those are my husband's naptimes.

Staring at the wheel, Cindy McCain wonders where the chauffeur attachment is.

hey cindy ,i made a joke on your husband and removed this from his fighter jet before his final flight over vietnam

If I turn to the left,will I crash and burn?

cindy this economy is so bad we will not be able to drive out of it

Here, practice STEERING with this.

"I know I am blonde, but doesn't a car belong to this wheel?'

After learning about the controls, Cindy McCain thinks about flip-flopping on the idea of wearing a helmet.

This is the main steering mechanism for the new voting machines , just plug it in and turn right but never to the left !

No Ma'am, I don't think this will help your husband's campaign with that kind of spin.

I have never seen this Simon game before!

I would like one in Hot Pink for my Barbie car that I will use for the inauguration; send the bill to Barrack Obam!

How many hanging chads will we get if I press this button?

No Maám, I´m sorry. For safety reasons there´s no make-up mirror.

the old man needs a zip.......... insert, turn and youve got youself a little old man from pasadena......................

Wind in your face is better'n Botox!

"A steering wheel, hey honey weren't you there when these were invented?"

"Will there be a GPS too? I'm horrible with directions..how do you think I ended up on the right?

Mrs. Mcain, let me explain the controls, since we all know who is REALLY in charge!

This is a steering wheel. It helps turn cars when they go very very fast.

There is nothing like the wheel life Cindy.

To make sure John stays on course when she's not around, Cindy McCain takes the "Straight Talk Express" steering wheel with her everywhere she goes.

No, it doesn't come in leather, only plastic, you know, the stuff they use to make credit cards.....

And when you push this button here, a compact with lipstick and mirror pops out.

And here Mrs. McCain is how you keep it center

This is a Neat !! Now I can drive a racecar but how are we going to bring gas prices down ??

This will be great for the straight talk express, but is there a compartment where my husband can hide his viagra?

a steering wheel, huh?? i've heard about these before. looks complicated – good thing i've never had to use one before...

If Danica can do it, so can I!

Indycar trying to steer McCain's campaign in the right direction.

If you push this button the passenger seat will eject.

I think I've seen this contraption before...How does it work?!

So if I turn this, the whole car turns? WOW! What'll they think of next?

This is our Hoveround Model 2009,our Florida residents love it . And it has a 3 month-30 mile , which ever comes first warranty .

And if you press this button, it will make your car go "Beep, Beep".

Apparently your bus has a loose nut behind the wheel.

Cindy's backup plan: "When the race is over for John, I may have a shot at my own".

This button changes gears,
this button activates the radio,
and this button makes the New Yorker put a cartoon depicting Obama as a Bin Laden loving Muslim on the front page.

More spin from the Mccain campaign.

Cameron Cox,
Winnipeg, Canada

Yes ma'am, this is the steering wheel your husband intends to use to drive the bus even further into the ditch. As per President Bush's directions, we designed it so that it does not turn... it only "stays the course."

It looks like someone cut the nuts off.

This is a Defibrillator for all our race car drivers over seventy, when thier out of pace or fall asleep at the wheel .

But I already told InBev that the Ignition controls don't register budweiser, this may be a deal breaker.

Round and round it goes.....where this election will stop no one knows.

And the life-alert button is right here.

Alright Cindy, every time John starts veering a little to the left, you just give a good turn back towards the right to keep the base happy, okay?

Stockholder McCain examines all thats left of the Anheuser-Busch racing team.

So, if john loses the POTUS race, he could have a new career as a race car driver and have a defibrillator just in case?

And the life-alert button is right there.

...and I can make this the handle of my home safe,budweiser was sold this week and i need something "Nascar" strong.

If the shortest distance between two points is a straight line, why are we looking at a wheel/circle. Is this only for Republicans?

This button changes gears,
this button activates the radio,
and this button makes the New Yorker put what ever cartoon you want them to on the front page.

Show me the money lady.

ISorry, 'm having a blond Barbie momebt here–what is this thing again? What dies it do??

Sadly misguided, Cindy McCain creates photo opportunities with an IndyCar official...she was attempting to show the McCains' committment to improving race relations.

.... and this button is for the secret compartment. Perfect for hiding the drugs you stole from your own charity.

"I'll tell you one thing, that guy is out on the track right now thinking he'll never take my lunch again."

No lady we don't have one in pink.

" The drivers use this to steer with"....." How are they going to use it when its not in the car"

I thought it would simpler if we started with the basics: Cindy this is a steering wheel.

"Here is the new Blonde Proof Steering Wheel you ordered."

The wheel will come a full circle when your husband becomes the next president.

Too bad your not racing for the Presidential Seat Cindy, I think you could take the National Cup home.

How do I set the GPS for 1600 Pennsylvania Ave??

James Friday
Cumming, Ga.

So you are telling me wheels were invented before John was born?

Princess Peach,how come Super Mario never taught you you how to drive ???????

Now I'm gonna hold this like this, while you look excited long for them to take the picture, so Mr. Mc Cain can get the Nascar vote

Cindy reflects on the moment the wheels came off her husbands campaign.

Beer heiress or not ,you can't drink and drive....

"And if you push this button, you'll look ten years younger."

Cindy, please give my lucky steering wheel to john it may help him stay on track.

No apology necessary! Honestly, John may not even notice that it's missing.

It's my money,if you won't let me drive,then,I'm taking my fortune and going home

So with this magic steering wheel I can steer my husband's campaign into the right direction ?

Yeah, if you want we could customize this to say First lady

"MR. I'm Cindy McCain, I KNOW a disc brake when I see one."

Do you have one made by GUCCI.

No, no, this not like Rachel Ray's recipes....I really have a knowledge of IndyCar auto races..........

What happened to the rest of the car?

yeah we can customize it to say first lady

I wanted to see all of the car...not just the wheel.

Cindy for the first time witnesses what a steering wheel looks like.

And just for you, this button will directly connect you to the Obama camp and mobilize a voice changer.

Yes I will pin it on my shirt, as long as it has some patriotic reference.

Listen , it also plays " Hail To The Chief " when you go left and 'The 1812 Overture " when you go right , and " God Bless America " when your right on Track .

Its about time a great woman takes control of the weel .

Cindy: "That's nice, but when can I get behind the wheel of one these here race cars?"

Here Cindy, this will help your husband out as the straight talk express goes round and round.

Cindy: "Ya'll think I can have my name in some rhinestones on one of these?"

Yes, I understand the concept of wind resistance when driving closely behind the car ahead of me, but with the media around, but please don't use the words "draft" and "McCain" in the same sentence.

And the car has how many cup holders?

Oh look , there's a misprint on this award , it read's McQueen not McCain , is that his Indy name .

Cool! Now do you want to see how beer is made?

You wouldn't give that to me if you knew where I got my money.

So let me get this straight, once this thing is powered up, the yellow thing pulls my foot out from where?

Oh right, this is what Bush and Cheney used to run us over in the 2000 primaries.

Is there a GPS I can set for the White House?

See, If you push this button here, A missile drops in Iran.

Cindy McCain getting one on one with her husbands latest answer to the oil crisis... The third wheel

Good Night Tony .

"I can give you a good deal on this one–it was returned by the Obama
team because they say it kept pulling him to the right"

Why yes Cindy, it is designed to steer only to the far right.

That's nice, but I'm actually looking for the powder room.
(Billy in Brooklyn)

See Mrs. McCain, if you turn it left, the car turns left. If you turn it right, the car goes into the wall. Understand?

"That is a lot of information..is this what they call a mental recession because I'm getting a headache?"

I may be blonde, but you don't have to explain "Oreos" to me.

"John's a Big Wheel. This one must be for Barack."

Cindy,one good turn deserve another.

Does this come with a lipstick holder?

"I appreciate your time sir, but I'm still not getting helmet-hair and I'm not a flip-flopper on this issue"

"And this is our handy six-pack holder."

And our first lesson,don't drink and drive ha ha ha ?!

"Hummmmm"

"Am I actually required to have a license to drive this car because that could be a problem?"

This will come in handy, for my "Backseat" driving.

"Yes, Mrs. McCain, it's like bumper cars just without the bumping"

"I can take this as a souvenir, yes?"

Learning to take over the drivers seat? Cindy you don't need the Indy staff, just call HIllary.

I know what that one does, I'm a 007 fan. It fires the machine guns.

Are you sure I'm supoosed to go left? That doesn't sound quite right.

Don't worry Cindy. Anderson can't figure out the controls in the Wii either.

And you press this button Cindy, when you want your husband to wake up!!!!

he can't just carry this!
where is the rest of the hoveround??

Hang on real tight and close your eye, click your heels three times and say there’s no place like the white house.

Yes Ma'am, attach this steering wheel to the "Straight Talk Express" and depress the "Red" button and your husband would have a smooth ride to the White House.

Here’s the first part and when you become first lady, you will get the rest of it.

The " Invisible car " makes it nice when you want to pass the others in the race. but your husband knows all about that.

Oh, can I get this made to match my purse & shoes?

Problem is, It wants to steer to the right or left, when unexpected.

Forget the steering wheel. I don't need it. Just show me where John's name and the Budweiser logo are painted on the car.

And if I press this button will it take my husband and I right to the White House?

We had to sell the rest of the car to pay for gas.

Gee, this is just what my husband needs to outrace Obama.

This is called a steering wheel. Believe it or not, it's used to steer a vehicle. No, really that's whait it does

Clyde E, Currie
Memphis, TN

Beep! Beep! Outta my way "Sunday Driver" The McCain's are coming threw to win the race.

Is that a sit and spin? John will love it!

Fasten your seat belts, It's going to be a "Bumpy Ride."

For you, Mrs McCain, it's a million dollars. Next we'll look at fenders.

"I am sorry cindy, John's bus just couldn't turn properly to the "right" and his campaign crashed. If he were to have had a wheel like this one he could have changed direction and at least saved his bus."

John will love it ! No one will accuse him of steering away from the subject again.

How it works is when he makes a wrong move, or comment, or forgets something, all you've got to do is turn it this way and he'll be back on course on the Straight Talk Express.

Ma'm just loosen this nut before you install it in Obama's car and it will take care of the rest.

What a bargain! I'll take one in every color.

Alisha, Raleigh NC

Okay Cindy for the last time! The song goes like this:
"The wheels on the bus go round and round,
round and round, round and round..."

John will love it ! No one will accuse John of "Steering Clear" of the subject again.

Are you sure there isn't any other colors. John may not like black and Barack might like driving.

Now Cindy, this is a wheel, and John was around before this was invented/.

Your husband needs to steer more to the right in order to win more Republicans!

Is this a frisbee?

It seems to pull a little to the right, we need to fix that!

My pinky isn't touching this thing is it?!?

Is there anyway I could get this in pink?

Plug it in, wind him up, and he will turn 20 years younger

We won't have to give them the straight talk if we can just outrun them.

Push these buttons, Ms. McCain...it will always steer to the right.

So you promise this will help my husband drive all the way into the White House?!

This looks just like the steering wheel in Barbie's Dream Car.

So let me get this straignt:
I get the steering wheel now and if my husband wins I'll get another part of the car each month for one low price. If Obama wins I still get to keep the steering wheel, right?

Do you think holding this steering wheel will improve my relations with the NASCAR fans for selling Budweiser to the Belgians?

Can i get one of these for my hybrid?

Cindy McCain learns to knock off any popular recipe with her new dial-o-matic cookie extruder.

WOW! Can I have this, it can really steer my husbands campaign in the right direction!!

Blake LeBrew
Milton Ma

So this is how John's thing works...

So– Does this thing come complete with onstar!

My husband could use this. He's shrinking, but where is the little car?

Cindy McCain practices for her take-over of the straight talk express.

Yeah, we can attach a flag pin right here.

"And this is where you hide your stash"

"I don't know about Michelle Obama but I have loved nascar all of my life!"

How come ,everytime we get an older candidate for president, the wife is really running things

Wow! I'd always thought 'shifting gears' had mythological origins.

So you're saying,the same safety features that allow NASCAR drivers to get outside of so many race and personal wrecks can work in a political campaign,too????????????????????????

Can I put this on my VISA card?

Can this wheel help us bring the White House to Arizona?

Sorry Mrs. But fuel prices were so high I sold my car for gas money this is all that’s left.

Why can't I have this large mirror in MY car?

NASCAR – started with moonshine.
Cindy McCain – got rich from beer.
Politicians – must all be on drugs !

So the steering wheels removable– is that some kind of anti-theft thing.

And there's your vanity mirror right next to make-up compartment.

"Is this like a key to any car i want?whooray I want a Cadillac but john McCain is to busy trying to be the president!

I'm sorry, but with the fuel prices being the way they are, everyone needs to cut back. I'm taking your steering wheel.

"ooh so this is the easy button seems like i don`t need to go to staples!"

Sorry Mrs. But fuel prices were so high I sold my car for gas money. This is all that’s left!!

Blake LeBrew
Milton Ma

No Cindy, taking Obama's steering wheel will not stop his drive to the white house.

The mechanic shows the thingamajiggie that controls the Internet to the Luddite's wife.

Is this part of one of those car thingys that the middle class keep complaining about due to the gas prices?

"Oh my god! How did you get a picture of John in this here thing?"

"thanks but i rather be on the tour de France but thanks anyway."

We made some last-minute adjustments to your husbands campaign so the alignment will pull more to the right.

Grant Cooley Erie, PA

If you don't hold the mirror straight, I can't see my hair, stupid japanese rearview mirrors!

This is boring, where is the champagne tent....

"And this is how you ram someone with your car miss."

"Time to sabotage Obama`s campaign with this wheel!"

That's it, turn it back toward the center since that's where Obama's been steering his lately.

"These are the steering wheels the drivers use."
"And what do they do?"

If you dont keep still, I can't see what it says, its just the hrn lady.Grant Cooley Erie, PA

Do you think one of these could get my husband more to the right?

This one works best by keeping taking you to the left.

Ken, Winnipeg

"please Cindy take the wheel."

Can I use this to drive Obama crazy?

I'm going to need a mirror on my steering wheel for those quick eyeliner touch-ups!

"Can this thing help with facials?"

How much for the rest of the car? Let me get two! It will be fun to race John on the national mall area!

Yes every car has one, even yours!

So then...this would allow John to steer left...THEN right?

So, is it for left-handed people?

I use something just like this to make my famous, McCain family Oreo cookies!

My husband has no use for this internet button.

"Just make sure that John remembers to turn the left blinker off."

Bats, Marietta, Georgia

Now this button right here, it's the turbo booster. Push it and John wakes up.

Yes..It will look like an accident...you know...Princess Diana's

Does it work without wheels?

I'd like to buy this...and this racecar...and this racetrack. Just put it on my tab.

Wow! Do you think this could rev John up? We haven't had much excitement since he started this campaign...

Obama have a seat, and leave the driving to us

If I turn Right, will I see McCain?

I'm sorry, this is all that we could salvage from the straight-talk express.

Wow! How nice of you. What an interesting purse. OK, I put my keys where?