Well, at least he can direct SOMETHING…

This is an exact replica of Barack Obamas Thorax!

Arizona Mike

Finally, after almost 8 years, I find a group I am good at leading.

Auditioning for his next job.

They’ve found the missing link.

“Dubya hears a Who.”

He conducts but once again only gets sour notes.

Bring it on!! Mr Oboe player.

Our fearless Leader !

Scientists have never quite understood why, when confronted with a strange sound, dogs will cock heads to the side.

Any requests?

Conductor & Chief

Play…NEAR THE DOOR, and we’ll help you out.

Despite repeated rehearsals and admonitions over 8 years the White House Press Chorus just would not sing the same tune for the President.

Seriously?….You guys don’t know “Take Me Out to the Ballgame?”

Bush figures if North Korea is manufacturing semiconductors, he’ll give it a whirl himself.

I NEED MORE COWBELL!

The President explains to the White House Correspondents just what they can do with “it”.

Waiting for the penny to drop on what to do with the stick in his other hand…

“Don’t I need 2 of these to eat my Chinese?”

“Hey guys - Watch me cross my eyes!”

Who said Cheney could have a solo?

What do you do with a President who can’t play a musical instrument?
Give him a stick, and call him a conductor.

Hmm,…the country looks about 4 quarts low.

This Ginzu knife is amazing.

President Bush, seen here commanding troops in the war on music, says this is his favorite and most successful war to date “because it’s just so dag’on fun.”

This is more fun that the Country Bear Jamboree at Disneyland!

“Read my lips: no new saxes.”

And I have no rythem either?

I wonder how many angels can dance on the head of THIS pin?

the only thing missing is the fat lady singing

If it was just this easy to conduct the congress……..

Great President. Will go down History as one of the Greatest US Presidents. He can conduct too? My goodness, very talented.

Finally living his Champale wishes, and Beer Nut dreams.

Come on, guys, you know my theme song is supposed to be “Hail To The Chief”, not “Send In The Clowns”!!

The “real” conductor has gone “Chopin”, and will be “Bach” in a “Minuet.”

Hey, maybe I can use this stick to change public opinion of me! It worked for Harry Potter!

Who ate all my cotton candy?

So I just wave this stick, and you guys play

Bush fulfills another one of his fantasies…playing the lead in “Fantasia”.

Wait a minute. Is that Bill Clinton back there on sax?

“With all due respect Mr. President, please step down. It’s time to pass your baton.”

Que the cheesy music!

“And now the lovely Lennon Sisters will sing for you, “The Devil Went Down to Georgia.”

A need that just a little louder…

It’s a lot more fun being a conductor then a commander

You guys know the 360 theme song ?

Michelle, Virginia

(In fake Australian accent) “That’s not a knife…”

Semper Hi-Fi

I just love the drums, come on drums I command you to play.

Heeeey, this isn’t a magic wand.

Bush Conducts Finale: Leader recognizes that one must listen to conduct! Is this Finale or Finally?

To test how “always ready” the members of the Marine Corps band are, Bush directs the woodwind section to Samarra Iraq.

From Washington, DC

Mr. Bush sends the band into the coda under false premises.

PLEASE ! NO ENCORE !

Hey Dick (Cheney), Condie, I need to hear your violins – a little louder please. We’ve gotta to train harder if are to get the job in ’09.

(He looks so cute; nice pic)

What does that Rev. Wright know about music and 4/4 time. See folks, I’ve got rhythm, too.

Ryan Field
New Hope, PA

Conduct town hall meetings, Conduct a ton of meetings with Oil companies, Conduct things that matter to ordinary people, Conduct what important to me. Conduct a plan to help us with Rice and Grain,
but please dont play music for it’s not time to dance, please conduct what you were elected to do - to make our American lives less trouble some these days……….

Can this protect me against impeachment?

…Now he’s sticking it to the band.

The Dark Arts come in handy for a Muggle. This is what Lord Voldemort gave to use to ward off impeachment.

Come on now……. we have gotten the intelligence all in………. this is only going to hurt a little!!

A one and a two and uh um uh, oh ya three!

President Bush after drinking a bottle of Vitamin water, attempts to direct the United Stated Armed Forces Orchestra in a remix “All Hail the Chief”, he will rap the hook himself.

I still don’t get why I need a long toothpick so that the band can play
I did brush my teeth today

They’re right! My popularity poll IS shrinking.

They’re right! My popularity pole IS shrinking

EVERY GOOD BOY DESERVES?…………..OH FUDGE I FORGOT WHAT COMES NEXT!

CAMERON COX
WINNIPEG, CANADA

Walk softly and carry a smaller stick!

The President conducting the President’s Own…Washington finally gets something right.

What do you mean Gas Prices are going up?

Constipated? Or, just feeling the music?

I SAW THE POPE DO THIS - WORKED FOR HIM!

CAMERON COX
WINNIPEG, CANADA

the only thing missing is the fat lady singing

“As I sing to you, the song of succession, don’t even think about a recession”

University Park PA

Puppet Master

Come over here.. so I can show you my new toy!

If y’all wish hard enough, when I wave my wand, I’ll disappear

Never had this much power before..

Can you spare a quarter, the economy is so bad I need it to get on the bus.

No…I don’t know FREE BIRD ! …. but how about SWEET HOME AL-OBAMA…I mean Alabama…

Mark S.
Saramento, CA

Hey, It looks like I could conduct this orchestra better than I could conduct a war.

What’cha mean there’s no more shish kabob?

” This here is a stick. Now remember, sticks and stones can break your bones but words can never harm you. THAT is music to my ears!”

Betty Ann
Nacogdoches,TX

The true weapon of mass distruction, a small stick and a little power.

JUST WAVE THE BATON? - WHO KNEW CHEERLEADING WOULD BE THIS HARD!

CAMERON COX
WINNIPEG, CANADA

Proof President Bush really DOES march to the beat of a different drummer.

His legacy salvaged by conducting leadership.

A disappointed President Bush holding the conductor’s baton after realizing he wasn’t going to be the conductor on the Amtrak train.

“And I thought pretending to run a country was hard.”

I thought the whole world was supposed to be singing to my tune…. so how come no ones listening and everything sounds so off-key?

Where’s the other chop stick?

Come on now people…your stimulus packages are on the way…grab your coat ,I got your hat…lets go shop until we drop.

So now what do I do Uncle Dick? Do I use this thing to draw a line in the sand?

Rubber Ducky…you’re the one!

The heck with the marine hymn lets give’m “Brother can you spare a dime?”.

JEnny Rome GA

C’mon, I’ve seen Harry Potter do this before. “Economy Gets Better and my ratings higher - abracadabra!! hmmm, abracadabra, is this magic wand broken?”

Yes, Jenna’s right a second grader is nine or ten years old.

As father of the bride, the only job he’s allowed to have is conducting the band auditions for Jenna’s wedding.

Ariann
Cleveland, Ohio

Still tone deaf and off beat no matter who’s bad is playing!!

1…2…3…1…2…3….Hey this job isn’t so hard 2..1…3…3…2…1 oops! I messed up did anyone notice…..again?

Cheney is true, Chinese chopsticks are indeed worth it plus recyclable.
Well I am too late for the plans now, hope McCain will proceed.

Houston
Texas

Duh…Duh…Duh. And a one, and a two, and a…..hey can you help me out hear (sp) (lol)

Sovereign..sovern, sovereignitity, sovereignty.. sove.. oh man i give up, i’ll stick to this stick thing

“‘Deep in the Heart of Texas’ gets me teary-eyed every time.”

Bush’s new motto: “conduct unproffessional and carry a little stick!” Wait thats always been his motto except for the little stick part.

Apprpriate….President Bush directing the “Wind” section of the symphony…

Awe shucks I wanted to play the triangle!

Huh? What’s that? Oh yes, Brownie, you do a heck of a job why don’t you get on up here.

I AM a fun president!

The maestro presides over an encore performance of the economy waltz: “Ready guys? Up one, two; down three, four; up one, two; down three, four.”

What am I conducting again ? Come sweet death or A Farewell to Arms?

Which one was the one composed by J.S. Bach? Whats this stick for anyways? How did I get here?

you can’t beat this job with a stick

“…. And for my last performance, I present to you ‘Fuel Crisis’ in D major.”

With this wand, I will poke thee.

1,2,3,4 “Oh, when the presidents go marching out!

Soon to be former president must sing for his supper!

WOW! This looks like I really know what I’m doing.

See, momma, I won’t poke my eye out, like you said I would.

“Its all stick now, carrots are too expensive.”

Something stuck in my teeth, you say? Well, ya’ll just stand back and watch me use this Texas Toothpick!

Heres the song, now hang on for the same old dance

I’m no Lawrence Welk, but where are the bubbles?

I was also a guest conductor for the Sesame Street Band!

Well, no wonder I was dancing so funny the other day! Guess where I found this stick?

I hope I don’t spear someone in the eye while conducting this OR-CHEST-ERA!

“Er… why did they give me a chopstick to conduct and American band?”

Los Angeles, CA

Hey kids! Watch me pull a rabbit out of this Marine’s hat!

If I don’t see bubbles soon, I’m not gonna do this next year

Finding the orchestra uncooperative, President Bush prepares to give them the Anthony Scalia salute.

Will it never end, we have how many days until he’s gone?

Now, that’s what I call a Texas sized toothpick! Did you make this in a “nuc - u lar” plant?

Ok. a one a two a three, “Its Good Be In D.C.”

Bubbles, gotta have bubbles, lot’s and lot’s of bubbles. Pretty bubbles, big ones, small ones shiny ones. Where was I ? Oh ya conducting .

From leader of the free world to leader of the band??

And they said this event was too formal for shish-kabob

Ok. a one a two a three, “Its Good To Be In D.C.”

Doesn’t sound like hip hop to me???

Is this a dagger which I see before me…?

The President demonstrates some of the least pleasant scenes from his recent physical exam.

Mr. President, you’re holding it by the cotton swab. Turn it around, Sir!

this is how I should have conducted the marines in the first place

Laura! …. Is this pasta “al detente” yet?

Man, I just can’t stop thinking about bubbles. I hope when they show this on “Beat 360″ They have bubbles. Lot’s and lot’s of bubbles.

….but before he left, the man in black left behind his mark - a “W” standing for Warro.

WHOA! Is there an elephant dancing on the top of this thing, or am I just having a flashback?

After being called Mr. President for eight years, Maestro has a nice sound to it.

President Bush tries not to show his disappointment at being handed an old-fashioned wooden baton instead of one of those super-cool Star Wars light saber batons.

Who says I can’t lead a war against terrorists? I seem to be conducting a bunch of Marines just fine!

Now for a song that never fails to inspire me: OH! ..Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?…

Finishing on a sour note.

When I do see bubbles I think I’m going to poke them with this here stick they gave me, that will be fun.

Yes, after leaving the White House he should make a fine Maitre de.

I wonder how many bubbles I will be able to bust?

“5,..4,..3,…2,…1…CCRRRRR!!!
We have lift-off!” We have lift-off!!!

I know theres a shortage on rice, but only one chopstick!

Bummer…it looks so much bigger from the front row.

Look Out Marines! Bills and Vetos will soon be music to your ears with Bush as your Conductor!

I’m gonna fire whoever got them to play this “Dixie Chicks” song! This ain’t funny!!

Note to self: Make sure Armed Forces bands learn more Merle Haggerd tunes.

Bummer…it looks so much bigger from the front row.

Michael
Honolulu

Bush shows everyone how big a thorn in his side Bin Laden really is…

If I could get 4 more years. Then we can rock

Watch out Europe- I’m still your master!

Maria B.
Kiel, Germany

The band played- “Nearer My God, To Thee”, as the Ship Of State sank in a sea of debt.

Bubbles coming out of the horn instruments, now that would be neat

“Aww shoot! I forgot to ask how to bring this song to an end!”

“you know, I think this is the best I’ve “conducted” myself during my whole presidency!”

Small bubbles out of the clarinet, medium ones out of the trumpets, and great big ones out of the tubas. Lot’s and lot’s of bubbles. I wonder if this song is about over?

“Abara Cadabara! What? What do you mean this isn’t a magic show?”

“And I need to hear a little more support from the approval ratings section…”

So you really think that if I get Bill Clinton on sax and Karl Rove to rap we can form the “Whitewater Trio”?

Little teenie weenie bubbles out of the flute.

“Hey Daddy, look at me! Look at me! They let me direct the band. Daddy, Daddy, did you see me??? I directed the band !”

Now come on George, “Concentrate!” You have a band to conduct

tap: check
sing: check
swing a baton: check check
American Idol here I come!

Maybe this something I can lead…

Those emblems on the Marine hats sure are shiny

I bet the audience would like to see bubbles. Bubbles make everyone happy

So now what? Do I say “On Guard!”

WOW! I could of had a V-8

“Come on Guys, This is my last chance to show that I can lead”.

Is it “or-chest-era” OR “or-cursed-era”? Oh please help me say it the right way. I’m conducting this mono-act play.

Bush: Please play for “Hail to Chief “, 1, 2, 3 and engage the music! They are playing now ” Hail to Chief.” I am conducting my show. Maybe I would watch on CNN beat 360 need chessy music for fans.

( He is so funny one! )
Megan D.
Shoreline, Wa

As Bush sinks the country deeper into debt, the band plays on, just like on the Titantic.

who knew this was supposed to be my true calling

“So they’re giving us THIS stick to beat them with ……. ? “

Am I cross-eyed yet?

Honey, what am I doing up here? Why am I holding a dipstick? Can somebody help me out so I can buy some gas?

on guard!

♪ Kill da waaaabbit ♪

Bush: Ahhh, my favorite, Mi contra fa, diabolus est in musica!

Where did the orchestra go? Oh wait I need to turn around

Who do you think you’re talking too, I am the President and don’t you ever forget it or I’ll beat you with this stick.

An orchestra is only as good as it”s conductor. Uh! Oh!

this is what a non-professional conductor looks like

Rock Me Amadeus Ro..Ro Rock Me Amadeus!
Amadeus Amadeus!!!

Bush: And they say I’m a “Misomusist”. What does that mean, anyway. Hmmm.

“…bibbidi-bobbidi-boo…”

“that’s it …you got the beat…360″

Where’s the man in the yellow hat when you need him?

“when asked how he plans to end the war, Bush cups his magic beans and pulls out his magic wand.”

Bush strains to get in rhythm with everyone else.

While thinking, uhmm? I’m doing pretty good … it’s actually really bad. aka - the Bush administration

“Take that China…Bush blows out Olympic torch.”

“A Texas size tooth-pick”

I’m in treble.

Jolene, St. Joseph, MI

President Bush personally auditioning bands for Jenna’s wedding reception….

AND HE FIDDLED WHILE IT BURNED!

Anyone here remember Lawrence Welk?

Hmm, I wonder if I could have this job full-time; you know, after I’m done with the whole presidency thing.

Yes, finally I can direct something correctly!

President Bush accidentally hypnotizes himself while conducting a pulsating rendition of “LA Woman.”

Dubya wonders who took the corn dog off his stick……

I know. I know. I can’t believe my own ears, either!

One more time, from the top… We’re going to keep practicing until I get it right!

Alfred E. Neuman conducts The Guns N’ Not Butter Orchestra playing,”What, Me Worry?”

Practicing for his retirement job as a Wal-Mart greeter!

Now you can’t say I never personally led the troops!

Fearing he will repeat his fathers visit to Japan President Bush is puzzled as to why is given on 1 chop stick.

Finding that he was pretty darn good at it, President Bush decided to take his new act on the road.

President Bush explaining the difference between the weight of air and the weight of solid objects.

Where’s the little flag I’m supposed to be waving?

MR. PRESIDENT … I knew Lawrence Welk and you, SIR, are no Lawrence Welk!

Oh, yeah, big joke … everyone thinks it’s funny until someone gets an eye poked out.

A one and a ??? Dang, where’s my teleprompter?

For Pete’s sake, this baton is stamped Made in China!

Do I have this right? You all will play music if I just wave this little stick around? Wow. That’s cool.

Bush, at a Once in a Lifetime event…’And you may ask yourself: How do I work this?’ Confused? Of course! ‘Same as it ever was…’

BOW TIE-$35
CUFF LINKS-$300
TUXEDO-$1500
WATCHING “W” SKEWER NANCY PELOSI-PRICELESS

You hold the detainee in your left hand and then you probe him.

A far cry from the Rolling Stones, this guy prefers the music of “The President’s Own.”

Hey, Laura. I think I have found my bliss.

“Wait a minute, I was told that I’m the conductor for this evening, so why am I not on a train?”

A man conducting with no experience! Go figure, maybe his dad played the tuba?

A country a little short on cash, they had to hire a fill-in.

So as not to bruise their commander’s pride, the Marine Corps band convinces President Bush that he is indeed conducting them. The truth would crush him.

If Y’all knew how sick I really am of playing the same old song too…!

That B was as flat as our economy

he is saying ” Guys would you accept now ,we are not in recession , Right?”

C”mon, guys. Pick up the pace. It’s “Hail to the Chief” not “Requiem for the King”.

can someone plzzz tell me…. why the hell marinators, using such a long tooth pick…

No one had the courage to tell the President that the orchestra was behind him.

“… And for my final performance, I present to you my personal favorite; ‘Economic Disaster’ in D major.’

I’ve Got IT! Ship Ten thousand of these–what are they called?–to Iraq. We’ll get the war humming like an orchestra.

Man who catch fly with chopstick accomplish anything.

The few, the proud, the mentally ill!

” I know this song !… Where is the part of the dancing sweeps?

Darn fly is on my wand!

” I know this song !… Where is the part of the dancing sweeps? ”

María Pérez from Colombia

What in tarnation! Get fly Gett!

…american idol , here i come!

Manny NGK
Los Angeles CA

Bush’s Opus

Well, this is a marching band. The extension cord will kill us.

Abrah Kadabrah Cheney Disappear…….

Wow harry potter’s magic wond…….

Merlin the conductor

now does this come with double AA batteries???

The leader of the free world becomes hypnotized… by a stick.

“My dear friends of the press. Now that you’ve eaten all that tasty food, how about something from SWEENEY TODD?”

The Prometeus 101 Symphony

So now that end is near… I did it my way…

Finally we get to know who composed that cheesy AC/360 music.

President Bush practicing conducting his composition “The Iraq War Overture” which will be introduced July 4th in lieu of “The 1812 Overture.”

Has anybody seen my ball of yarn?????

Raindrops keep falling in my hand…

You want me to put this WHERE?

8 long years and I still don’t have a clue of what I’m doing.

give me the beat boy’s and free my soul

This is what I like to do when the democrats continue to nag me on the failing economy….I tune them out with loud music.

I don’t have a hat to pass…..you can just put your tips in my hand.

I don’t like the sound of that french horn……it’s out of tune

I remember when I first started this job in 2000, I had so many plans and dreams. Now, I find myself still dreaming about those plans .